Take A Chance On Me

[CALVIN HAGAN]

It had been two weeks. Erin avoided being alone with him at every possible moment and Cal was going crazy considering all the things she thought about him. It was worse than fucking high school. At least in high school he had a Devil may care attitude that allowed him to remain aloof when a girl turned him down. And not to toot his horn, but that had been a rare occurrence. That was exactly why kids needed to learn about rejection—so they would know how to deal with it when they were grown-ass men and women. He’d learned rejection in a lot of ways, but with women he’d usually been lucky or not emotionally invested enough to care. That was impossible with Erin. All he wanted was just a couple minutes to clear the air, to hear it from her own sweet lips that she had no interest in him. Instead, she would let Cora ring him up at the shop and let Molly do all of the talking in the evenings. When he went to sleep at night, he was often tormented by the memory of that brief kiss, wishing he could repeat it. But of course, this was all a silent struggle—at least he thought it was. His team knew he was pissed off more than usual and had deeper bags under his eyes, but they simply avoided him when possible and talked fast when they couldn’t. Just like the woman he was silently obsessing over. He had it bad.

Finally, he wasn’t going to stand for it anymore. It was time to grow a pair and ask her out regardless of whether there were people around or not. He was going to do it. All the way to Cora’s shop, he gathered his courage and thought of how he would ask. Every time he remembered how humiliating this all was, he shook his head and reminded himself that he could use a course in humility. A couple of times he stopped on his march over to the shop, looking like a doofus standing stock still on the sidewalk while people gave him odd looks. He simply scowled in return and forced himself to keep walking. When he finally reached the shop and looked in, his stomach jumped into his throat and strangled him. There was Erin looking as pretty as a picture behind the counter. The bell rang when he walked in and she finally looked up. Shit. It took everything in him not to walk right back out.

Apparently Erin felt the same as she turned and made for the back. “Wait, Erin. Just…give me a minute, okay?” She turned back, obviously reluctant, and Cal heaved a deep sigh as he moved to the counter. His hand swiped over his rough jaw before he made it to the counter and leaned against it. When he made eye contact once more, he didn’t realize how much he looked like a lost puppy. “You’ve been avoiding me for two weeks now. I can’t blame you, but it’s driving me crazy.” His voice was low so that if Cora was lurking nearby, she wouldn’t hear all of what he was saying. “I told you how I feel and I still have no idea how you feel other than I obviously did something wrong when I kissed you. Not that I don’t think I did anything wrong, because I did step over the line, but I’ve never heard you say that. Not that you should have to say it. I mean, it would be nice if you said it. Well, not nice if you say you don’t like me and never want to see me again, but at least then I’d have an answer.” He sighed, running his hands over his now very red face as he made a bigger and bigger ass out of himself. “This is not going nearly as well as I’d hoped…” he groaned into his palms. When he put them back on the counter, he forced himself to make eye contact once more. “What I’m trying to say is, will you give me a chance?”

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

Two weeks. It had been two weeks since Cal had been over her home, watching a movie with her and her child, making pizza and joking and snuggling and kissing. Every time Erin thought of the kiss she got a strange sensation in her stomach. It wasn't that it was completely unexpected, though she obviously wasn't expecting it then. Well, she didn't expect a kiss at all, but a confession of sorts, well that she knew was probably somewhere in her future. Not that night, no, but she wasn't completely ignorant to affections. She hoped it was just friendly, but she knew it had the potential to be more. A crush, maybe.. She didn't want to be in a relationship just yet, though. Of course she longed to date, wanting a partner, but the timing was never right and she needed to focus on herself and Molly and how could she possibly do both of those things and have a boyfriend at the same time? No, she had put her foot down on the matter and decided she'd waited this long, what was another seven years or so? Maybe she'd meet a nice guy with some kids of his own, mostly grown, and she could focus on just them. The thought of not having anymore babies of her own had always been a sad one, but she liked the dynamic she had with just her one, mostly perfect child. At the end of the day she didn't want to be with anyone, even Cal. Every time she thought of the finality of that, she felt a pang of remorse. Cal was annoying, but she had to admit he had some good qualities she'd like in a partner. First off, he was unattached, as in in no crazy exes that she knew of or children. Hell, he had never been married. Molly absolutely adored him and she knew the feeling was mutual. She questioned it at first, but now that she knew him she knew it wasn't perverted. He genuinely liked kids because he had so many in his family, but they were far. It helped that Molly was an extremely likable girl. Last, he had a code of honor being a cop. She'd gone missing, and though he was partially to blame for it, he hadn't rested until she was safe at home. She respected that and appreciated that, and she knew Molly saw him as a true hero. Maybe in a way he was, even though he had failed to find her. Still, it felt weird to consider him as anything other than the nuisance he'd been since she'd met him, even if she felt a little softer towards him now.

Until she could figure out a reasonable response to Cal's actions, Erin had been avoiding him like the plague, and when she did find herself in her presence Molly was always there or Cora and she knew he wouldn't bring up what happened in front of them. He knew better to do it in front of Molly and Erin got the feeling Cal was afraid of being rejected in front of Cora. But as each day passed, it became harder for her to confront him because she simply didn't kn ow what to say, and tried not to think about it. So when she did see him coming, she quickly ran away because she simply hadn't decided on anything yet, that is until he came in and stopped her before she could run off.

The bell rang and Erin looked up, seeing the familiar hazel eyes of Cal. As always she moved to go to the back, about to call out for Cora when he called out to her to stop. “Wait, Erin. Just…give me a minute, okay?” Her heart pounded in her chest as her feet stopped in their tracks, her teeth nipping at the inside of her bottom lip instinctively. She turned and watched him come to the counter, leaning against it and looking ragged. Anxiety was etched on both their faces as they both realized the talk was finally about to happen. She kept her distance, a few feet back from the counter. “You’ve been avoiding me for two weeks now. I can’t blame you, but it’s driving me crazy.” Her cheeks flushed and she looked at her feet, a little ashamed at the way she'd been treating him. It wasn't personal, she wished he knew that, it was just a weird situation for her and she hated not being in complete control. “I told you how I feel and I still have no idea how you feel other than I obviously did something wrong when I kissed you. Not that I don’t think I did anything wrong, because I did step over the line, but I’ve never heard you say that. Not that you should have to say it. I mean, it would be nice if you said it. Well, not nice if you say you don’t like me and never want to see me again, but at least then I’d have an answer.” He sighed and she felt bad, wishing she had a better explanation. Her fingers danced together, running nervously together and she listened to him ramble on and on. “This is not going nearly as well as I’d hoped…” She finally looked up though her head stayed low, large, dark brown eyes gazing at the nervous man in front of her. “What I’m trying to say is, will you give me a chance?”

Erin felt her face flush and she knew she couldn't avoid him any longer. He needed to know why she did what she did, and he needed to know why she couldn't give him a chance. With a heavy sigh she moved to the counter and leaned on it, getting closer to him, their eyes locked. "I like you, Cal. You're a great guy.." She licked her lips and swallowed hard, hating this part more. "You've been great to me and Molly's just.. she's over the moon about you. I know how badly she wishes you were her dad, but the fact of the matter is you're not." She bit her bottom lip and her teeth slowly scraped the flesh as she tried to put this as gently as possible. "She's my whole world and I just don't want to risk hurting her. I don't want to risk hurting what she and I have.." It was mostly true, but the underlying message was clear; she was afraid of getting hurt just as much as she was afraid of Molly getting hurt. "You have no reason to stick around, and if things went sour with us.. I'm afraid to give anything a chance. Losing you would kill her, and at least like this you have no obligation's. If we ended up hating each other, it would be weird for you and Molly to keep in touch, but if things just stay as they are then.." Her brows creased and she frowned a little. "Am I making sense?"

[CALVIN HAGAN]

Cal could see the flush in Erin’s cheeks as he gazed at her nervously, leaned onto his hands on the counter. She sighed and stepped closer, mimicking his stance as those big doe eyes came to his. Did she have to be so beautiful? “I like you, Cal. You’re a great guy…” His stomach twisted in anticipation, jumping when she said she liked him. Unfortunately, he could feel the “but” coming on and his stomach began to sink. “You’ve been great to me and Molly’s just…she’s over the moon about you. I know how badly she wishes you were her dad, but the fact of the matter is you’re not.” Wait, the kid wanted him to be her dad? That sure explained a lot…He just thought she looked up to him and saw him as a mentor of sorts. Obviously she found him worthy of dating her mother. He’d never thought that she wanted him to be her dad, though...It seemed foolish that he hadn’t put that together, but the realization hit him hard. He wasn’t her dad, Erin was right…could he even take that on? Sure he wanted to, he just didn’t know if he was worthy of it. But who was talking about him becoming dad to Molly? He just wanted a date! “She’s my whole world and I just don’t want to risk hurting her. I don’t want to risk hurting what she and I have…” And going on a date with him would do that? He could see where she was going and wanting to protect Molly, but she was spinning this the wrong way. Then again, maybe she was doing that on purpose to get out of dating him. By feigning to protect Molly, she was really protecting herself. That was so like her…

“You have no reason to stick around, and if things went sour with us…I’m afraid to give anything a chance. Losing you would kill her, and at least like this you have no obligations. If we ended up hating each other, it would be weird for you and Molly to keep in touch, but if things just stay as they are then…” Her plump mouth frowned and Cal’s brow furrowed with all of the questions and rebuttals he had formulating on the tip of his tongue. “Am I making sense?” He shook his head. “Erin, I’m not talking about marrying you. I’m talking about taking you on a date.” The look she gave him told Cal that she was frustrated and flustered and he cut off her arguments. “I know. What if you have a good time and we go on another? And another? I’m not expecting that, but it sure would be great.” He gave her a small, lopsided smile. She didn’t seem amused and his face fell to a serious look again, leaning in more. “But we don’t have to tell Molly anything until you’re comfortable with that. I know better than to talk about any of this or anything related to this around her. I’m not so cruel or stupid that I would get her hopes up before I even knew what was going to come of all this.” He gave her a curious look. “And who says I don’t have obligations here? I’m captain of the vice unit for the city. Of course I have an obligation to stay, whether you choose to give me a chance or not.”

With a sigh, he leaned a little more heavily on the counter, tilting his head to one side with a sort of unintentional puppy dog look. “Just one chance. If you decide you don’t want to do it again, I’ll never ask for a second.” She was still hesitating and a light bulb clicked over his head. “Or it doesn’t have to be a date. Call it…a non-date. It’ll just be a casual dinner. We can even do it at my place so nobody has a chance of seeing us out in public together. Or wherever you want to go. The point is, we can keep it quiet and informal. Then when I wow you with how much fun I am, we can go on a real date.” He smiled more, being playful even though his stomach was doing flips in his gut. Now if only she would agree…

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

Cal was shaking his head and she suddenly felt a little defeated. “Erin, I’m not talking about marrying you. I’m talking about taking you on a date.” She huffed slightly. She knew he wasn't proposing, but didn't he realize it could eventually come to that? You don't date someone unless you either want to eventually marry them or get into their pants. She wasn't interested in "having fun" and she didn't think Cal was the type to do that to her anyway. She opened her mouth to tell him just then when he cut her off completely. “I know. What if you have a good time and we go on another? And another? I’m not expecting that, but it sure would be great.” He seemed amused by this line of reasoning, but unfortunately she was not. He got the picture and got more serious again. “But we don’t have to tell Molly anything until you’re comfortable with that. I know better than to talk about any of this or anything related to this around her. I’m not so cruel or stupid that I would get her hopes up before I even knew what was going to come of all this. And who says I don’t have obligations here? I’m captain of the vice unit for the city. Of course I have an obligation to stay, whether you choose to give me a chance or not.” That wasn't what she meant. Erin looked down at the counter, feeling flustered and confused. She just couldn't date him. Could she?

He must have sensed she was still being reluctant. His sigh was very telling and she looked up again, watching him give her that sad, lost puppy dog look he was so very good at producing. “Just one chance. If you decide you don’t want to do it again, I’ll never ask for a second.” The problem wasn't so much if she didn't like it, but rather if she did. “Or it doesn’t have to be a date. Call it…a non-date. It’ll just be a casual dinner. We can even do it at my place so nobody has a chance of seeing us out in public together. Or wherever you want to go. The point is, we can keep it quiet and informal. Then when I wow you with how much fun I am, we can go on a real date.” He was smiling at her in a way that was pleading. Sure, on the outside it seemed playful, but she knew Cal well enough to know he was really trying hard to get her to agree. Her lips pursed slightly. She was torn, wanting to turn him down and not turning him down at the same time.

"It's not a date." She reiterated, giving him a serious look. "Molly can't know, whether we have fun or not, and she can't know if we do happen to do it again another time. I decide if and when she, and anyone else, finds out." She was on the verge of a panic attack. Was she seriously agreeing to this? Why was she agreeing to this? It felt so wrong and so right, her heart fluttering with a sort of giddiness though her stomach was in knots with anxiety. Cal agreed and she gave him a stern sort of look, fear in her eyes. "Alright." She said more slowly. "When?"

This would be interesting.

[CALVIN HAGAN]

Erin’s lips pursed in consideration making Cal’s stomach twist more. Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes… He swore this woman liked to make him sweat. “It’s not a date.” His heart throbbed excitedly. Did that mean…? “Molly can’t know, whether we have fun or not, and she can’t know if we do happen to do it again another time. I decide if and when she, and anyone, finds out.” Cal grinned from ear to ear as he nodded in agreement. He could have sung he was so elated and he didn’t do that often. “My lips are sealed,” he promised, adding a silent, To yours, if you let me. It was better to keep that to himself. He was just getting his foot in the door and he didn’t want to fuck it up now. Why did she have to look so stern? Or did she look scared? Either way, he wished there was some way of easing her fear that he was going to hurt her. If anyone was going to end up hurt in this situation, he was sure it would be him. “Alright. When?” Cal considered a moment and gave her a curious look. “How about Friday? We can meet at Dylan’s at eight.” To his delight, she agreed. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t a “date,” but it was as good as in his book. It was a great start and he was going to make the best of it.

He didn’t know what scared his detectives more—him being in a bad mood or a good one. For the next few days Cal didn’t yell or get frustrated with any of his employees. He didn’t even grumble at them. That didn’t mean he was easy on them but everyone was suspicious of his patience and general toleration of questions and updates on cases. He didn’t know Faye had a theory among her coworkers that he was finally getting laid and they all speculated on what kind of woman would be with a thorny hardass like the captain. Maybe it was that Erin O’Brien? Her kid still came by from time to time and he was still getting coffee from the shop she worked in every afternoon. While this was a popular theory, no one could confirm it and nobody wanted to try. Cal knew there was gossip spreading about him, but he simply ignored it. He had more important things to focus on. Like what to wear…

When Friday rolled around, Cal had to keep his mind off his excitement most of the day. Whenever the thought of his non-date crossed his mind it made his heart pound a little harder and his guts knot. That couldn’t be good for his health. God, he was such a teenager about this. He had enough time to go home and get ready beforehand. He washed up and trimmed his scruff, his short dark hair slightly mussed as it usually was. Donning a plain army green button down shirt and blue jeans, he felt satisfied that he looked like he cared just enough for this to be a casual dinner. His stomach and heart begged to differ. Slapping on a hint of cologne like he usually did in the mornings, he took a deep breath and glared at himself in the mirror. “You’re gonna be fine,” he stated. He wasn’t convincing himself, but at least he tried. His head nodded curtly before he left the bathroom and headed out of the door to the café.

It wasn’t too crowded for a Friday night, but there were enough people to blend in with the crowd. He waited outside the restaurant, checking the time on his phone. 7:56. So he was a couple minutes early. With a sigh, he leaned back against the brick wall and waited for Erin to show her pretty face. He hoped he wasn’t about to be stood up.

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

“How about Friday? We can meet at Dylan’s at eight.” He seemed to have been planning this. How could he know she'd say yes? Maybe he didn't. Maybe he decided he would be prepared in case she did say yes. Either way Dylan's was a decent enough place. Not fancy, not over the top or anything, just a casual place for them to talk. That seemed so weird.. but it wasn't a date, so Dylan's was a good pick. "Alright. Friday at Dylan's. Eight o'clock." She was glad he didn't insist on trying to pick her up. She would need to figure out what to do with Molly so she wouldn't suspect.. Maybe Cora could help her out with that. He seemed pleased enough with her answer and left, leaving her feeling anxious and unsure. Was she making the right decision?

That night Erin did some real soul searching once Molly had gone to bed. She poured herself a glass of wine and instead of picking up a book, checking her email or catching up on TV she sat silently on the couch, staring blankly at the wall. Had Molly been awake she certainly would be concerned but Molly was in bed and Erin needed to really get her head in the right place. She thought about the pros and cons of meeting up with Cal, with where it might lead and what that would mean for not only her, but Molly. Molly was at a weird age. She would begin rebelling in the next few years and it might not be so bad to have a father figure around. Then again, it might make her act out more. Last thing she wanted was for her daughter to resent her for having a guy around, and Cal was definitely the type of guy to step in. He already did, not that he'd ever completely overstepped his boundaries. He knew his place and he respected her authority when it came to her daughter, but that didn't mean it would always be that way. Then again maybe she was over thinking it all. They were just getting supper as friends. Even as she thought it she knew it wasn't true. Cal was trying to impress her. He was interested. He'd kissed her and asked her out, begged her to quit avoiding him.. She was foolish to think that he would back off. This was happening, ready or not, like it or not. And deep down, she did like it. She liked the attention, liked that someone was interested, like that the interested party had a solid job, no major baggage and already had a positive history with the most important person in her life. Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing for Cal to become a figure in their lives. If things worked out, and that was a semi big if in Erin's skeptical mind.

Over the next few days Erin continued to ponder on what life would be like attached, allowing herself to grow more comfortable with the idea. She even talked a little to Cora about it, since the woman was going to be watching Molly on the night of the non-date. Of course Cora was all about it. She'd been rooting for Cal since the beginning, but Erin was still a little on the fence. She wasn't sure she could even tolerate him for an entire evening alone. Molly had always been an incredibly amazing buffer. Then there was the thoughts on what she should even wear to this evening out with captain kissy face. Casual? Dressy casual? Dressy? Dylan's wasn't the classiest place so a nice casual, not too dressy, would be good. Mentally she went through her wardrobe and picked outfits while boxing cupcakes and decorating birthday cakes.

When Friday rolled around Erin was a nervous wreck and Molly was a bouncing ball of energy. She could not wait to spend the night with Cora who already "secretly" promised to let her stay up late and eat all the garbage her mother forbade her to. They were getting pizza, making sundaes and Cora had more candy stocked up than Erin cared to know about. Julie was even planning to make an appearance, in all her pregnant, engaged glory, news of which had been a huge surprise to Erin. That was not what she had expected at all from goody two shoes Julie, who should have known that fertility ran rampant in her family. The hours dwindled quickly and Erin wondered if someone had sped time up to mess with her. Finally, the bakery closed, Molly was with Cora, and Erin was a wreck making her way back to her place. She washed up and tried on at least seven outfits, three of them twice, before finally choosing a modest off white dress with a deep blue belt. She paired the ensemble with flat soled brown boots and wore only a little makeup, intent on not making herself look too nice in case he decided to call it a date. They'd decided this wasn't one and she wanted to stick with that. For now at least.

Erin peeked at her phone as she headed out to meet Cal. Nine minutes.. That was cutting it a bit close, but she could probably make it there right on time. As it turned out she got to Dylan's at exactly 8:01, one minute late, and she was certain she was about to hear about it from Cal. That would be annoying but predictable of him. Or maybe she was wrong about him all along.. She felt her heart pound seeing him standing there outside of the restaurant, presumably waiting for her. "Hey." She greeted with a kind smile, her stomach flipping from a strange mixture of nerves and hunger. She pulled her petticoat tighter around her frame to keep the chill out. "Ready to eat?"

[CALVIN HAGAN]

Cal stared at the cement, just waiting for Erin to show up. He forced himself to not glance at his watch again. She would be there—he had to keep reassuring himself of that. Erin wouldn’t stand him up. She knew he would confront her about it if she did and she didn’t like confrontation. Every set of footsteps nearby drew his eyes, but over and over he was disappointed to see it wasn’t his date. No, not date—friend. But a familiar stride caught his ear and he finally laid eyes on who he’d been waiting for. She was in a peacoat and a cream colored dress, a smile on her pretty face. Cal’s stomach flipped six times in a matter of about five seconds, forcing him to gulp hard to calm it. He gave a nervous but friendly smile, standing straight as she approached. “Hey,” he greeted happily. The relief in his voice was evident. “Hey. Ready to eat?” “Starving.” He grinned wider and waved her ahead of him, grabbing the door for her casually. Even if this wasn’t a date, he could still treat her with chivalry. The hostess greeted them with a bright, bubbly smile and asked if it was just two. Cal nodded and let Erin go ahead of him as they walked back to their table. The server assured them their waiter would be along shortly.

Cal pulled off his coat and tossed it into the booth next to him before sliding in, Erin taking her place across from him. “So, where did you stash Molly for the night?” She told him Cora had taken her and Julie wasn’t going to join them too—a girls’ night in. “No doubt Cora is going to stuff her full of junk.” He grinned at Erin’s reaction, knowing she didn’t like it but also knowing Cora liked to spoil Molly. “Did she do the same to Julie when she was young?” Apparently she did, but only once a month or so. He was surprised to learn they’d eaten out a lot when Julie was young, before her stepdad came along. “She sure doesn’t look like it. Julie is skinny as a rail.” Not for much longer, according to Erin. She was pregnant and engaged! To the heir of the Remington Hotel even! Cal’s eyes widened and he raised his eyebrows. “Damn! Well congratulations to her! That kid is set for life.” He smiled at Erin’s response. Despite his nerves, he was glad they could slip into conversation so easily.

Just then the waiter sidled up to their table, a young guy named Connor with a warm smile. He took their drink orders, Cal letting Erin go first before ordering a beer. It would calm him down a little. When he looked back at Erin, he couldn’t help but admire how gorgeous she was. The dress complimented her pale skin well and brought out the warmth in her big, doe eyes. “You look nice tonight, by the way.” He gave a kind smile, obviously a little nervous at complimenting her, but sincere as well. She seemed flustered and he inwardly grinned. At least she wasn’t disgusted by it. “I tell you, I felt like a lady this evening when I got home. I had no idea what to wear. I must have stared at my clothes for fifteen minutes like this.” He knitted his brows together angrily, glaring ahead of him and frowning before he grinned again, hoping to amuse her. “I think I discovered part of my feminine side. I knew she was in there somewhere. I’m actually feeling very sensitive this evening. I might start crying if you’re mean to me. Like if you tell me these jeans make me look fat.” He gave her a warning look, playfully serious and his voice very matter-of-fact. If they were going to do this, he might as well make it fun and humorous.

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

“Starving.” She met his grin with her own and bowed her head a little as he waved her into the restaurant, opening the door for her. Her eyes met him as she walked past, narrowing her eyes playfully, silently teasing him for being chivalrous. The hostess greeted them and then showed them to their table, Cal again nodding her to go ahead of him. She did, but she almost wished he wouldn't treat her like this, even if it did feel sort of nice. She had insisted it wasn't a date, but she knew it was on some level. Cal was treating it like one, and treating her like his date. Normally, she would have been annoyed by this, but for now she was absorbing it, allowing herself, for once, to just go with the flow. She could pick it all apart later and kick herself for being such a typical girl, but for now she would enjoy the treatment because it might be the last time for a long time.

“So, where did you stash Molly for the night?” She gave a little chuckle as she made herself comfortable on the booths bench. "Cora offered to take her. Molly is beside herself, she loves spending the night there especially when Julie's there." A fourth person usually meant better games would be played. “No doubt Cora is going to stuff her full of junk.” She groaned with a sort of smile, sliding a hand down her face. "Ugh, don't remind me. At least she's Cora's problem while she's in her sugary state. I'll get her back tomorrow after she's slept it off, assuming Cora doesn't load her up in the morning as well." Which was very likely since Luke took requests in the morning, or there was likely going to be plenty of cold pizza to be consumed. Though his pancakes were some of the best around. “Did she do the same to Julie when she was young?” Erin nodded, surprised at how easy it was to talk with him. "Believe it or not, Cora doesn't cook much. She bakes because she's good at it, but when it comes to dinner.. she'd much sooner call for take out." “She sure doesn’t look like it. Julie is skinny as a rail.” Erin couldn't help but snort. "Not for long. Julie's expecting." She explained. "And she's engaged to the Remington Hotel's heir." her tone was almost mocking, but in an affectionate way. "I was not expecting that. It all came a little suddenly." Cal seemed surprised by the news as well, his eyes widening slightly. “Damn! Well congratulations to her! That kid is set for life.” Erin nodded, a pang of jealousy swimming in her belly. It was nice that Julie wouldn't have to struggle like her mother or like Erin. She was happy for her, if not a little envious. She would have loved to have given Molly a father, and all the luxuries she'd been offered. Julie was obviously better at finding suitable partners.

The waiter came by then, allowing them to break in conversation, asking what they wanted. Cal let her go first and she ordered an iced tea and waited while he ordered himself a beer. Was he usually a beer drinker or was that for his nerves? Was he really nervous? Erin couldn't imagine he would be, considering who he was. The man led a fleet of police officers after all. “You look nice tonight, by the way.” His smile was kind and her reaction was a little less so. She arched a brow, not knowing what to say in return, other than thank you, though words escaped her at the moment. “I tell you, I felt like a lady this evening when I got home. I had no idea what to wear. I must have stared at my clothes for fifteen minutes like this.” His impression amused her a little and she relaxed, smiling warmly at his silly impersonation of himself. Part of her wanted to remind him it wasn't a date so he didn't need to feel like he had to impress her, but she bit her tongue. She didn't want to rub it in his face, not when he was being so nice. “I think I discovered part of my feminine side. I knew she was in there somewhere. I’m actually feeling very sensitive this evening. I might start crying if you’re mean to me. Like if you tell me these jeans make me look fat.” Her left brow raised considerably as she gave him a funny look. "Well, you're dressed fine, but maybe you should have focused more on your hair and less on your outfit." She taunted. His hair looked just fine, but when she showed the slightest sign of being suddenly a little concerned she finally grinned. "I'm teasing. You're pretty as a picture." She pushed a smile on her face just as Conner came back with their drinks, asking if they needed another minute to look over the menu. She confirmed they did and thanked the boy kindly before he ran off.

"I was on my own picking out an outfit also." She conceded. "Normally when I have to go out and look semi decent I model for Molly who either gives a thumbs up or down. She's better than any mirror, far more scrupulous than me." Erin explained, bringing her drink to her mouth and taking a sip through her straw. "So I picked what I thought she'd want me to wear if she knew I was hanging out with you." Molly had always liked this dress, and in a lineup it was usually her choice when she wanted her mother to look good for something, like if they were going to a show which they did around the holidays. "I feel so sneaky going behind her back. We usually tell each other everything.. I only have maybe a couple more years of her doing that so I take advantage of it. Did you know there's a boy in her class who is not completely disgusting?" She smiled, recalling the conversation. Molly didn't understand crushes really, but knew that this boy wasn't as gross as the others in her mind. She liked talking to him, and about him to Erin who didn't mind listening. "Anyway.." She didn't want to sit and talk about Molly all night, though she easily could have. "How's the precinct? Catch any bad guys recently?" There was an air of teasing in her tone as she took another sip of her iced tea, glancing down at the menu as she tried to figure out what she might want as he spoke.

[CALVIN HAGAN]

“Well, you’re dressed fine, but maybe you should have focused more on your hair and less on your outfit.” Cal had been grinning, but suddenly his smile faded and his brow furrowed. He reached his hand up and ran it through his short hair, genuinely concerned there was something out of place. When Erin grinned, he narrowed his eyes playfully. “I’m teasing. You’re pretty as a picture.” He smiled and covered his right cheek. “Oh stop, you’ll make me blush.” When Conner came back to the table, Cal looked up and smiled a thank you to the boy as he placed his beer down in front of him. Erin confirmed that they needed a little more time to look at the menu before the lad scampered off to attend to other tables. Cal took a moment to glance at his menu, fairly certain he was going to get his favorite bacon cheeseburger. “I was on my own picking out an outfit also.” Cal raised his eyes and a brow curiously. “Normally when I have to go out and look semi decent I model for Molly who either gives a thumbs up or down. She’s better than any mirror, far more scrupulous than me.” He smiled warmly, picturing Molly eagerly helping her mom dress. It was something he wished he could witness but knew it wouldn’t be the same with a boy around. That was one thing that he was certain would always remain a mystery to him. “So I picked what I thought she’d want me to wear if she knew I was hanging out with you.” He smiled wider. “Well you and her have very good taste,” he complimented. For once he felt like he could compliment her freely and not have to feel weird about it. In fact, it almost felt natural.

“I feel so sneaky going behind her back. We usually tell each other everything…I only have maybe a couple more years of her doing that so I take advantage of it.” He could imagine that being hard for a mother to face—the dreaded teenage years of rebellion and self-discovery. Then again, he knew there were girls who remained best friends with their moms even when they were in high school. He’d dated a couple of them and never understood how a child could be so close to either of their parents. Back then, he had secretly envied that relationship, wishing he’d had something like that with his absent father. Now he wished Molly would continue to have that with Erin. Something told him she would. “Did you know there’s a boy in her class who is not completely disgusting?” Cal raised his eyebrows and drew his mouth down in a curious, long-faced look of admiration. “Really? I’m fairly certain all boys are completely disgusting until they’re thirty. It may even be a permanent condition.” He nodded sagely before grinning. Surprisingly, Erin didn’t jump on that remark.

“Anyway…How’s the precinct? Catch any bad guys recently?” Cal gave a heavy sigh before taking a sip of his beer, making sure her eyes were on him when he set his glass back down. “I didn’t want to have to do this so soon…but I should tell you the real reason I asked you here tonight.” His eyes came to hers with all seriousness. “I have the place surrounded. There’s nowhere for you to run. We know what you did and I’m bringing you in.” She looked genuinely concerned and confused. The grin cracked across his face, unable to keep it in anymore. “And that’s for making me worry about my hair. I told you I was sensitive tonight.” Her reaction made him laugh, but he could clearly tell she wasn’t really mad at him. At last he finally gave a shrug. “Naw, nothing really exciting has been going on. Well, except for guy who was high on PCP and literally tearing up his cell screaming about how he was in love with Barbie and no one else could have her. It took three huge guys to get this guy into the cell in the first place. Good thing he was scrawny and relatively easy to carry. Now I have to get the city to replace everything in that cell, including the toilet he ripped out of the ground. It still smells like sewage in there.” He shook his head, his eyebrows raised. “Love makes you do crazy things. Even when your true love is a fictional character and an inanimate object.” Conner appeared to take their orders. Erin told him to go first, so Cal ordered his usual bacon cheeseburger with extra pickles. Then Erin put in her order and Cal nodded as the boy rushed off again assuring them their food would be ready in about twenty minutes. When he looked back at Erin, he smiled. “And then there’s the middle school teacher who was caught giving a guy a blowjob in a back alley. A married middle school teacher. He begged us not to tell his wife or his job, but he now has a citation on record for lewd behavior. I think the schools around here do regular background checks on their employees, too, so I wonder if he’ll have a job next year. It’s a shame, really.” The look Erin was giving him made Cal pause. “Hey, you asked. Well…I guess he doesn’t really count as a ‘bad guy.’ Then again, cheating on your wife is pretty bad, whether it’s with a guy or a girl.” Erin didn’t seem convinced by his explanation and Cal put his hands up. “Okay, maybe that was the wrong story to bring up. I apologize. What about the bakery? Anything dramatic happening there? Crazy wedding cake orders or bizarre cupcake demands? I bet you’ve seen some weird stuff in your time.” He smiled, veering the topic away from lewd behavior that would make Erin wonder who was teaching her child.

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

Her brow furrowed slightly as he sighed, sipping his beer. What could be so troubling? “I didn’t want to have to do this so soon…but I should tell you the real reason I asked you here tonight.” She looked at him skeptically, not sure if he was messing with her or not. He seemed serious, but he was good at that, he was a freaking cop. Was Kurt out? She wasn't afraid of him. Not completely.. “I have the place surrounded. There’s nowhere for you to run. We know what you did and I’m bringing you in.” Now she was confused. What was he talking about? Surely he was messing with her. Did they find something out about the kidnapping case? No, it wouldn't go down like this, he wouldn't ask her out and do that. He was messing with her! As she figured it out a huge grin slid across his face. She wasn't nearly as amused. “And that’s for making me worry about my hair. I told you I was sensitive tonight.” She picked up her napkin and threw it at him, wishing there was something more she could throw. "Jerk, you had me going for a minute!" Of course he laughed and she let out a deep breath, chuckling ever so slightly.

“Naw, nothing really exciting has been going on. Well, except for guy who was high on PCP and literally tearing up his cell screaming about how he was in love with Barbie and no one else could have her." He went on to explain how the guy tore up the entire cell and how it took three of them to detain him, Erin grinning more as he told his story. “Love makes you do crazy things. Even when your true love is a fictional character and an inanimate object.” She smiled and shook her head. "I suppose it does." Erin had never actually been in love so she had nothing to really go on there other than to just take his word on it. Part of her wondered if she would ever actually be in love with anyone, and as Conner arrive to take their order, she eyed Cal a second longer. Would he push to be in their lives? Would she ever love him? She wondered if she was capable of that sort of love.

"You go first." She told Cal as she quickly skimmed the menu, not knowing yet exactly what she wanted. He ordered and she was placed on the spot. "Umm, I'll have the turkey club, mayo on the side please." She smiled politely and handed her folded menu to the boy who accepted it before moving on to put their orders. Cal was quick to pick up the conversation, and she allowed her attention to fall on him completely once more. And then there’s the middle school teacher who was caught giving a guy a blowjob in a back alley. A married middle school teacher." This new story actually made her frown. There were three middle schools in the area, two public and one private, and Molly attended one of them. Could it be on of her teachers? "He begged us not to tell his wife or his job, but he now has a citation on record for lewd behavior. I think the schools around here do regular background checks on their employees, too, so I wonder if he’ll have a job next year. It’s a shame, really.” She wasn't sure about that. She wasn't entirely sure she wanted someone who was incapable of making wise decisions teaching her child! Cheating on your wife was disgraceful, but in public with another man? Who was so stupidly careless? “Hey, you asked. Well…I guess he doesn’t really count as a ‘bad guy.’ Then again, cheating on your wife is pretty bad, whether it’s with a guy or a girl.” She sniffed, "I would consider him a bad guy, and certainly not the kind of person I would want around my child eight hours a day. Who--" Cal put his hands up to stop her and she frowned at the gesture. "Okay, maybe that was the wrong story to bring up. I apologize. What about the bakery? Anything dramatic happening there? Crazy wedding cake orders or bizarre cupcake demands? I bet you've seen some weird stuff in your time.” He smiled, but she suddenly felt huffy, wanting to probe him for more details. You weren't supposed to talk about this stuff on dates! Then again this wasn't a date. Still she could tell he wasn't interested in pursuing that conversation any further and she had to seriously bite her tongue from attacking him on the topic.

"Nothing weird recently." Her mood was slightly dampened now, unable to focus on the question he'd just asked her. "Uhh.. Cora's seen some terrible things but.." She bit her bottom lip reaching for her iced tea and ten pulling her hand away. "At least tell me if the guy works at Molly's school." Cal didn't like this, she could immediately, but she wasn't able to stop herself! "I swear, that's the only question. Just.. does he work there? I just need to know!"

[CALVIN HAGAN]

Erin hesitated before she answered his questions and Cal had a feeling she was still stuck on what he had talking about a moment ago. He definitely shouldn’t have said anything… “Nothing weird recently. Uhh…Cora’s seen some terrible things but…” Cal snorted a little at how Erin worded that. Like Cora had been in the trenches of the great Cupcake Battle of Scriptor Bay. He couldn’t tease her for it, though. She looked too uncertain of something she wanted to ask and he was bracing himself for the obvious. “At least tell me if the guy works at Molly’s school.” Heaving a heavy sigh, Cal sat back in his seat a little. He wasn’t supposed to tell the details of cases to anyone other than his boss and the other officers working the cases. Erin shouldn’t be privy to that private information—it was a violation of privacy and that didn’t sit well with Cal. “I swear that’s the only question. Just…does he work there? I just need to know!” She didn’t need to know, she wanted to know because not having an answer would drive her crazy. Quite possibly literally. Cal wanted to date the woman, not add onto her neuroses. The pleading look in her big brown eyes made him frown as defeat slowly slid over him.

With a heavy sigh, he leaned forward again. “Fine…yes, he works there.” The look on Erin’s face as she paled told him she wasn’t pleased at all with that information. “He’s a teacher for the learning challenged classes, though. You know, the kids that need a little more attention than the rest. There was no indication that his…preferences extended to anyone other than consenting adults.” His voice was both reassuring and firm to ensure there wouldn’t be any other personal questions about the guy. He gave a smile. “So you don’t have to worry. He wouldn’t know Molly because she’s in the higher classes. Plus, obviously the guy has some issues, but I don’t think they extend to his workplace.” Erin wasn’t entirely convinced. How could he know all of that without asking him directly if he’d assaulted any of his students? “I’ve been around child molesters before. There’s a certain feeling about them. I didn’t get any of that from this guy. Just because the guy may be something of a mild sexual deviant doesn’t mean he’ll hurt anyone. He seemed concerned about his job because teaching is his career—with something like this on file, it’ll be incredibly difficult for him to get a job elsewhere. This could ruin him.” He couldn’t help but pity the guy a little. All he’d wanted was some time to indulge in his private desires that he obviously kept repressed for whatever reason. It wasn’t right to do it behind his wife’s back or in an alley, but maybe that was just an indication of how desperate the guy was to escape his life for a little while. Too bad he couldn’t make it to a bedroom.

“That being said, you can’t breathe a word of this to anyone, okay? I shouldn’t have even told you all of that. It’s not that I don’t trust you to keep a secret, I just have to look out for the criminals too, you know?” Erin understood and he was glad he wouldn’t have to regret this later. Well…no more than he regretted it now. He took a long swig from his beer, wondering if he might get some information out of her too. There was a question he’d always wanted to know the answer too but had never been brave enough to ask. Right now seemed as good a time as any and he might actually get an answer to it. “So since I answered a question I didn’t want to, I have one for you. It’s kind of random, but I’ve always been curious. Are your parents still around? Do they take an interest in you and Molly?” It was obvious she wasn’t expecting the question nor was she looking forward to answering it and Cal immediately put his hands up in surrender. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want. Like I said, I’ve just always been curious.” He was a little nervous that she might close herself off and go cold for the rest of the evening, but he figured it was a fair question. She certainly didn’t have to talk about if she didn’t want to.

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

Cal didn't seemed pleased with her request, but the look on his face told her he was at least mulling it over. “Fine" Her breath was trapped in her throat as she waited for him to answer her. "…yes, he works there.” She suddenly felt a little ill. Was she in class with the pervert all day?! Cal seemed to read her mind, continuing without her actually asking him to. “He’s a teacher for the learning challenged classes, though. You know, the kids that need a little more attention than the rest. There was no indication that his…preferences extended to anyone other than consenting adults. So you don’t have to worry. He wouldn’t know Molly because she’s in the higher classes. Plus, obviously the guy has some issues, but I don’t think they extend to his workplace.” Though it was reassuring to hear that the guy didn't seem to have any direct contact with her daughter, that wasn't to say he never would, or that it was alright he was with children who were potentially more impressionable than Molly who was on the higher end of the spectrum. What if he hurt one of the kids who looked up to him?

“I’ve been around child molesters before. There’s a certain feeling about them. I didn’t get any of that from this guy." She bit her lip, surprised he was so in tune with her thoughts. She supposed it wasn't entirely crazy for him to assume correctly what she was thinking. "Just because the guy may be something of a mild sexual deviant doesn’t mean he’ll hurt anyone. He seemed concerned about his job because teaching is his career—with something like this on file, it’ll be incredibly difficult for him to get a job elsewhere. This could ruin him.” She supposed he had a point, but still, Erin wasn't entirely comfortable with a man who makes poor personal decision guiding such impressionable children and encouraging them to make the right choices in life. She supposed it wasn't entirely her place to judge him without knowing the full details, but being an overprotective parent she couldn't help but feel some amount of concern. “That being said, you can’t breathe a word of this to anyone, okay? I shouldn’t have even told you all of that. It’s not that I don’t trust you to keep a secret, I just have to look out for the criminals too, you know?” She pursed her lips but then nodded. "I won't say a word." She assured him, though she was already considering breaking that promise to Cora. She needed to vent to someone! No. No, she sort of just promised. Not that Cal would ever know. Then again, Cora wasn't exactly known for having the tightest lips.

She reached for her drink and sipped it as he drank deeply from his own cup. “So since I answered a question I didn’t want to, I have one for you. It’s kind of random, but I’ve always been curious." "Uh oh.." She muttered from across the table, placing her glass back down and bracing herself. "Are your parents still around? Do they take an interest in you and Molly?” Her brows raised slightly, surprised by his question. It was a personal one, that was for sure, but she knew he was just trying to get to know her. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want. Like I said, I’ve just always been curious.” He repeated, putting his hands up in a show of mock surrender. "It's alright." She waved his hands away and thought about what she wanted to say before finally opening her mouth. "My parents.. they had a certain idea of how things should happen and I was more than willing to abide by their rules for my life. Really, I could have the world as long as I did what they wanted, and fortunately for all of us their wants coincided with my own. As you know my unplanned pregnancy naturally threw a wrench in everyone's plans and my new ideas for my life didn't coincide with their's anymore. They tried desperately to convince me to put Molly up for adoption because if was already too late for abortion when they found out. They even offered to have me finish school while they raised the baby for me, but them raising it would really mean round the clock nannies and I wasn't alright with that plan either. I offered to finish school locally and raise Molly, which they didn't like very much since who leaves Yale to go to Greenwolfe." She laughed a little, knowing that really was as absurd as it sounded. "They liked that idea best, but in the end I didn't like the way I was being treated and I moved in with Cora and Julie and dropped out of school completely. My mom went ballistic when that happened and we had some pretty huge fights in the months fighting until I cut her off completely. I didn't need to deal with that on top of an already very stressful situation." She was surprising herself with how much she was offering, but it felt nice to talk to someone about it, and Cal seemed genuinely interested. "I didn't talk to my parents much for years, not until Molly was in kindergarten. We started getting together for holidays and that's pretty much stayed the same since with the occasional dinner or lunch dates. I know my mom wants to be more involved, especially since Molly is older and more fun now, but I just don't want either of them pushing their ideas onto her of what her life should be like. I want to guide Molly in the right direction, not force her, and hope she makes the right decisions." Molly was a lot like her. She knew she wouldn't have anything to worry about. Julie turned out great and her mother wasn't a whole lot different than Erin. "I just don't think I'll ever forgive some of the harsh words spoken to me during those tough times twelve years ago." She admitted. Even now the topic of her life choices still started an argument, but her parents were wise enough not to bring it up very often anymore. "Anyway.." She shrugged, "That's the story of my parents." She left it at that, hoping he might bring up his own parents since he never really spoke about them. She knew his sisters basically raised him, but she wasn't sure on all of the little details. That topic seemed sore with Cal though, so she didn't want to ask about it. Not yet..

[CALVIN HAGAN]

“It’s alright.” Whew! At least Erin wasn’t mad. Cal waited patiently for her to begin talking about her parents and Erin appeared to be searching for the right words. “My parents…they had a certain idea of how things should happen and I was more than willing to abide by their rules for my life. Really, I could have the world as long as I did what they wanted, and fortunately for all of us their wants coincided with my own. As you know my unplanned pregnancy naturally threw a wrench in everyone’s plans and my new ideas for my life didn’t coincide with theirs anymore. They tried desperately to convince me to put Molly up for adoption because it was already too late for abortion when they found out. They even offered to have me finish school while they raised the baby for me, but them raising it would really mean round the clock nannies and I wasn’t alright with that plan either. I offered to finish school locally and raise Molly, which they didn’t like very much since who leaves Yale to go to Greenwolfe?” She gave a soft laugh and Cal gave his own crooked, amused smile, but there was something very sad in her voice. No doubt she regretted some of the turns her life took. He knew Molly certainly wasn’t one of her regrets, but the timing of it all was certainly something to regret. “They liked that idea best, but in the end I didn’t like the way I was being treated and moved in with Cora and Julie and dropped out of school completely. My mom when ballistic when that happened and we had some pretty huge fights in the months fighting until I cut her off completely. I didn’t need to deal with that on top of an already very stressful situation.” Especially for a girl who was used to having so much support from her parents. There was a time when he considered Erin little more than a pampered snob, but he regretted that now. She’d actually been through quite a lot and she deserved his sympathy. “I didn’t talk to my parents much for years, not until Molly was in kindergarten. We started getting together for holidays and that’s pretty much stayed the same since with the occasional dinner or lunch dates. I know my mom wants to be more involved, especially since Molly is older and more fun now, but I just don’t want either of them pushing their ideas onto her of what her life should be like. I want to guide Molly in the right direction, not force her, and hope she makes the right decisions.” Cal nodded, finishing off his beer as he considered her story. If someone tried telling him how to raise his kid, he would have the same reaction. “I just don’t think I’ll ever forgive some of the harsh words spoken to me during those tough times twelve years ago.” That was something he could understand too. There were some hurts that never healed…

“Anyway…that’s the story of my parents.” She shrugged and fell silent and Cal gave a small smile. “Thanks for sharing it. For the record, I think you’ve done right by Molly in keeping them at a distance. It sounds like the sheltered life you had with your parents didn’t protect you enough when you got old enough to leave the nest and you’re just trying to do your best to keep that from happening to Molly. Plus, that kid is as stubborn as you—I can’t imagine your parents liking the repeat of history if they tried to force her in the direction they wanted you to go. Molly does what she wants.” He grinned wider, the corners of his mouth wrinkling in amusement. Erin was amused too, and from her smile she seemed to appreciate his input. He gave a small shrug of his own. “I can’t say who has the better history with their parents—you or me. Yours were overbearing and mine didn’t care about me as much as they cared about their vices.” Cal looked at her face to see if she was really curious about his story and found that she was. Maybe for once he could bear of bit of his own heart. After all, Erin had, and it would be a show of good faith to return the favor. He’s mentioned his relationship with his sister and her kids before as well as some of the darkest parts of his criminal past, but he hadn’t mentioned much about the rest of his family. Scratching the back of his head, he continued. “Mom died of an overdose when I was still just a kid. My younger brother Joey was only three and I was about six. My older brother Paul was eight and my sister Tessie was twelve. Mom tried to care for us as best as she could, but it’s hard to do that with a heroin addiction. One of my only memories of her is of one time when she was going through withdrawal. She was so sick and aching and I just remembering watching the way relief eased her whole body when she shot up again in front of me. I’ll never forget how guilty she looked when she realized I was standing nearby.” He was staring at the table with a thousand yard gaze remembering how sad her big, green eyes had been.

“When she died, my sister became mother hen to my brothers and I, as I told you before. Dad would come home once every ten days to two weeks. He was a truck driver. He would stay a few days and then hit the road again. Tessie would make sure she got as much money as she needed to keep us alive and well before he drank it all again. He was always a drunk. All of us in the house, especially my mother, got hit pretty regularly for minor things. Mom kept us safe as much and as long as she could when she was alive, but when she died it was Tess who took Dad on. She was way tougher than Mom yet there were times when my older brother or I would step in to fight Dad off.” The memories of his father’s black and red eyes glaring down at him made Cal cringe internally. Even now he felt nothing but an empty void when he thought of the man. “He wasn’t good for much of anything except to bring money home from time to time. We just had to put up with him long enough for him to get another assignment. It was amazing the old man never killed someone with his rig the way he drank. But the drink was going to kill him one way or another. When I was ten he died of cirrhosis. He never went to the doctor, but he ended up in the hospital for alcohol poisoning one weekend and they discovered the damage the disease had already done to his liver. Within four months he was gone. His life insurance policy was the only legacy he left to us and Tess squirreled that away and finished high school early so she could take care of my brothers and I.” His eyes came to Erin’s and he could tell from the look on her face that she sympathized with him. It was surprisingly cathartic to go into all of this with her, yet it left him feeling exposed. He didn’t like it and gave a smile to try and push the feeling away. “Who needs parents when you have awesome family members to care for you?” For once he’d found something in common with Erin—they both had been forced to rely on the charity and hard work of others in the past and they were determined never to do it again.

Just when Erin looked like she was going to say something, Connor was back and asking if he wanted another beer. Cal declined and asked for a soda instead before looking back to his non-date. Connor took her order for another iced tea as well and Cal took the moment of distraction to admire Erin again. Even if she didn’t want to see him again after tonight, Cal knew he wouldn’t regret taking her out. Connor hustled away and Erin’s gaze fell on him. He started back to full consciousness and he scratched his beard nervously that she’d found him staring. “You know…it’s actually kinda nice to talk to someone else about my history and not be judged by it. I can’t remember the last time I talked to anyone besides Tessie and Joey about this stuff.” A crooked smile graced his mouth and when she shared the sentiment, he grinned even wider. For a moment he would let himself dare to hope that something very good could come of tonight. He gave a small sigh and leaned back in his booth. “Of course, my story isn’t nearly as bad as some of the kids I grew up with in Southie. They say that area of Boston is up and coming now, but it was a rough neighborhood when I was growing up there. That’s how it was so easy for me to get into drugs and tussles with gangs. You could hardly go anywhere in that town without stepping in someone’s turf. It was the definition of the wrong side of the tracks.” The image of their completely opposing childhoods made Cal grin smugly. “I bet your parents would never have let you hang out with riffraff like me when you were younger.”

[ERIN O'BRIEN]

“Thanks for sharing it. For the record, I think you’ve done right by Molly in keeping them at a distance. It sounds like the sheltered life you had with your parents didn’t protect you enough when you got old enough to leave the nest and you’re just trying to do your best to keep that from happening to Molly." She appreciated the compliment and smiled politely at him. She was also glad he seemed appreciative of the glimpse into her life. She was sure he wasn't expecting her to go into such great detail about her family history, though she sensed that he really was very curious. Cal seemed to genuinely want to know her, and it was becoming increasingly apparent. "Plus, that kid is as stubborn as you—I can’t imagine your parents liking the repeat of history if they tried to force her in the direction they wanted you to go. Molly does what she wants.” She gave a soft chuckle and nodded. "That's an understatement." she teased. Molly was a stubborn little thing, but she was a good girl, too. Strong and smart, independent but capable of making the right decisions.

“I can’t say who has the better history with their parents—you or me." Her head tilted to the side, intrigued with his comment, sensing she was going to get a chance to decide for herself. "Yours were overbearing and mine didn’t care about me as much as they cared about their vices.” His words stung before he even went into detail. Vices were never good. “Mom died of an overdose when I was still just a kid. My younger brother Joey was only three and I was about six." Erin already hated the story, but watched him with sad, fascinated eyes as he continued on. "My older brother Paul was eight and my sister Tessie was twelve. Mom tried to care for us as best as she could, but it’s hard to do that with a heroin addiction. One of my only memories of her is of one time when she was going through withdrawal. She was so sick and aching and I just remembering watching the way relief eased her whole body when she shot up again in front of me. I’ll never forget how guilty she looked when she realized I was standing nearby.” Erin felt her stomach shift uncomfortably, suddenly feeling bad for Cal. That was no life for a child.

His tragic tale continued, going on about how his sister took over his mother's job raising the children. Twelve years old.. Molly was twelve years old. Knowing how mature Molly was put a lot of things into perspective; she was a strong, smart child but incapable of properly caring for three boys. No way would Erin let Molly babysit more than one child at this age. But to constantly care for three smaller ones? She suddenly felt a lot of respect for Cal's older sister. When Cal began to talk about the abuse from his father her shoulders slumped. Every mean thought she'd ever had for Cal seemed to slither away guiltily, as if he had a right to be and do whatever he wanted because of the life he'd started with. She couldn't even imagine; things were tough for her, but not like this. Not even close.

"When I was ten he died of cirrhosis. He never went to the doctor, but he ended up in the hospital for alcohol poisoning one weekend and they discovered the damage the disease had already done to his liver. Within four months he was gone. His life insurance policy was the only legacy he left to us and Tess squirreled that away and finished high school early so she could take care of my brothers and I.” She knew what that was like, squirreling away money. For months she'd done that, saving every penny so she could leave her mother's house, and when she finally did she had to count ever penny to make sure there was enough to get everything she needed for Molly. Cora had been helpful then, and she was sure she couldn't have done it without her, but things had been tight. Even then, she imagined not nearly as tight as what Cal's family was working with.

“Who needs parents when you have awesome family members to care for you?” Her smile was weak, feeling down about the story she'd been told. At least she had her parents, and though they had made many mistakes, in a pinch they would help her. It was her pride getting in the way. The terrible choices they made were all done out of love. Perhaps a little bit of embarrassment too, but they cared enough to want to do right by her unlike Cal's family. He won the worst parents game, hands down. She opened her mouth to say so, but Connor came and by the time he left she felt silly saying it. It could be an inappropriate thing to say, almost like she was rubbing it in that he'd had a worse time at life than her. When she looked back at Cal she saw him staring at her, gazing almost absently as though he were thinking about something, and then he was looking almost bashful, scratching at his beard and causing her to tilt her head and narrow her eyes questioningly. What was that about?

“You know…it’s actually kinda nice to talk to someone else about my history and not be judged by it. I can’t remember the last time I talked to anyone besides Tessie and Joey about this stuff.” What about Paul? Did he speak to Paul? She tried to remember their past conversations about his siblings, but couldn't remember if something happened to his older brother or not. He was grinning and she did so back, giving a little not. It was sort of nice airing dirty laundry to new audiences, especially after coming so far from it all. “Of course, my story isn’t nearly as bad as some of the kids I grew up with in Southie. They say that area of Boston is up and coming now, but it was a rough neighborhood when I was growing up there. That’s how it was so easy for me to get into drugs and tussles with gangs. You could hardly go anywhere in that town without stepping in someone’s turf. It was the definition of the wrong side of the tracks.” She shook her head and held up a hand. "I don't think I want to know about the worse stories." There was a humorous undertone to her words, but it was evident she didn't find it amusing. Quite the opposite. “I bet your parents would never have let you hang out with riffraff like me when you were younger.” She snorted and shook her head. "They wouldn't have gotten the chance to forbid me. I would have never put myself in a situation where I would have met any riffraff." She smiled wider and then blushed, feeling like maybe she'd insulted him. "I mean.." She licked her lips, not sure how to backpedal and finally gave a nervous sort of laugh. "I did a lot of extracurricular activities. I barely had a social life growing up, they didn't give me the chance to mingle with the wrong crowd. I saw friends at school and occasionally at birthday parties or in clubs after school, and the occasional play date or study session, but that was it. No hanging at the mall or movies or any of that." Not that she didn't go to the movies or mall, but it wasn't usually with a bunch of kids, and if it was then they were kept on a strict schedule. "God, I was such a spoiled brat.." Her tone was soft as if she'd just come to this conclusion. Erin's eyes looked almost sad as she gave Cal a weak smile, propping her elbow on the table and cradling her chin. "If it makes you feel better, they would probably like you now. Only after congratulated you for climbing out of the gutter. I bet they'd actually say it just like that. The gutter.." She snorted and looked between them on the table, feeling sad at the judgments they would quickly pass on Cal. The same judgments she would have only twelve years ago. "If I've ever come off as high and mighty.." She gulped, giving a pleading look back at Cal. "You know, old habits.. they can die hard. I don't think I'm better than anyone, but I know I can come off that way." She suddenly hoped she'd never offended him. Strange how things change once you get to know a person.

[CALVIN HAGAN]

The way Erin snorted and shook her head made Cal smile wider. “They wouldn’t have gotten the chance to forbid me. I would have never put myself in a situation where I would have met any riffraff.” He laughed. That sounded like the Erin he knew! He noticed the flush in her cheeks and it surprised him. “I mean…” She gave a nervous laugh. Did she think he was offended? He didn’t laugh out of pity! “I did a lot of extracurricular activities. I barely had a social life growing up. They didn’t give me the chance to mingle with the wrong crowd. I saw friends at school and occasionally at birthday parties or in clubs after school, and the occasional play date or study session, but that was it. No hanging at the mall or movies or any of that.” Cal raised his eyebrows and shook his head a little. That was a lot to expect from a teenager! Didn’t she want to do those things? “God, I was such a spoiled brat…” Cal smirked and gave a soft chuckle, but the look in her eyes didn’t reflect that she was amused by the thought. In fact, it looked like this had just occurred to her. Did his story of growing up in the life of hard knocks really have that much of an effect on her? Erin propped her head up on an elbow and smiled at him made Cal uneasy. He hoped there weren’t about to be words of pity coming from her. That wasn’t why he’d talked about his childhood. “If it makes you feel any better, they would probably like you now. Only after they congratulated you for climbing out of the gutter. I bet they’d actually say it just like that. The gutter…” She snorted and he did the same, shaking his head a bit. Rich people could really be crass sometimes for all of their high society.

“If I’ve ever come off as high and mighty…” Cal’s eyes lifted to hers once more only to find Erin giving him a pleading look. He couldn’t take that look…Those big doe eyes never failed to make his heart jump. “You know, old habits…they can die hard. I don’t think I’m better than anyone, but I know I can come off that way.” It was strange to have Erin almost apologizing for her previous behavior towards him. He knew it was mostly because of the history she had just told him. She felt bad for having been a jerk to the man who had come up from nothing. It wasn’t what he was expecting and he didn’t really know how to handle it. He didn’t want pity—but he was glad she finally knew more of his story. So he would handle as he did everything else—with humor. “Why do you think I began pestering you in the first place? Your snooty attitude made me want to knock you down a peg. I see I finally succeeded.” He gave a triumphant grin before adding a playful wink. When she smiled, he felt he’d cleared the air of pity and he folded his hands on the table in front of him. “You weren’t so bad when I got to see you with Molly. Getting to know you…it’s changed my mind about you. As for old habits, well…I know how well they can stick. I’ve never had much patience and I’ve always been wicked rough at the edges. I know I’ve gotten on your nerves plenty and pushed your patience as well. So thanks for giving me a chance to change that.” Erin returned the sentiment and it occurred to Cal that they had just turned to a blank page in their story. It was new and crisp and somewhat nerve-wracking to see how much possibility there was there. He felt now it was okay to hope that Erin would give him a second chance to really romance her. The future was bright with the past between them forgiven.

Their food came and Cal enthusiastically dug into his burger. With his nerves settled and the smells coming from the kitchen, his stomach had been on the verge of talking when this blessed slab of cow arrived. It was a great burger and cooked just right. He gave a soft grunt of appreciation, not even thinking that it might throw Erin off. It took him a second to look up at Erin and see her giving him an odd look. “Excuse you. This burger and I are having a moment.” He looked back to the burger. “It’s okay, baby. She just doesn’t understand what we have.” Erin’s reaction finally made him grin before taking another bite. When he swallowed, he gave her a suspicious look. “So between all of these extracurriculars at school and all those good grades, when did you have time to date?” The thought of proper little Erin O’Brien going on dates to the diner or slipping into a movie for an excuse to make out just seemed off to him. But it must have happened, right? Knowing the tramp he’d been in high school, he assumed all high school students were as horny and stupid as he had been.