Self Destruction At Its Finest

[REMY GRAHAM]

Remy was released from the hospital two days after he'd been brought in. The first thing he asked Julie to do, since she had been kind enough to pick him up, was to stop at Dominic's where he ordered way too much Italian food to bring home. He'd be eating leftovers all week, which suited him just fine. He and Julie ate together, talking a little, mostly business, but Remy was quiet. Gloom seemed to hang over them like a darkened rain cloud. He didn't even try to hit on her that evening, and though she offered to stay, he insisted she went home to rest. Remy knew she sought comfort from him and was worried about him, but he just didn't have the mindset to care much about her in the way she needed right now. He got way too drunk and passed out before ten.

The following morning rose with a splitting headache and some dry mouth. Remy drank several cups of water and ate some cold leftover chicken marsala before dragging himself into the shower, something that proved to be insanely painful. His wound hurt and every time he moved his arm, which was often, the dull ache shot through the length of his arm and shoulder. After the shower he bandaged his arm once more and got to drinking. By noon he was sleeping again and when he did finally wake up he got dressed and went into the office. It was late and most people were getting ready to leave, but he had some work he needed to get done before going to the hospital to visit his mother. Several employees stopped by to check on him and ask about his mother, something which only annoyed Remy, and after the third visit her got up and locked his office. If Julie was there, she never noticed him come in, and he never sought her out.

From the paperwork on his desk and the emails she'd sent, he could see that she'd been diligently working to do what he asked. All of the Remington's employees background checks were there for his review and a memo had, indeed, been sent out that random drug tests would be administered from then on out. No security had been hired yet but he was sure Julie was working on that as well. He'd missed both her phone calls that day, which happened to be both times he was sleeping off his drunken stupor, and had yet to call her back. He decided if he was feeling up to it, maybe later that day.

Remy didn't stay long at the office, deciding he would do some of his work at home. The sooner he saw his mother, the sooner he could get back to the bottle of whiskey on his coffee table. When he arrived he saw the evidence of Cora's Cupcake's goods having been consumed, and again he knew Julie had followed through with his request. When he walked into his mothers room he saw that the girl was already there, probably having just brought some goods for the new shift change, and he felt an overwhelming amount of appreciated for her. She was doing everything he simply could not. Or maybe it was what he would not. There had been no major changes in Caroline, and he was soon ready to leave the miserable hospital room once more, this time insisting Julie came home with him. Julie was patient as she ate leftovers with him, let him drink until he could barely walk to the bathroom, changed his bandaging and then let him drunkenly fondle her until he passed out. She was there when he woke, his good arm curling around her and holding her tight for a long time. They had sloppy sex, Remy too sore to be a good partner, and again she was patient as he spent the morning brooding and drinking. She left only when he promised to answer the phone when she called later, but he didn't.

The days seemed to grow worse for Remy as he fell into a darker place. Alcohol became his outlet as he healed and he grew more withdrawn with each passing day. A week had passed and he still hadn't looked at the background checks, always telling himself tomorrow he would get started, but tomorrow always came and went and the work just didn't get done. He began ignoring Julie's calls and soon stopped visiting the hospital. It wasn't like his mom was making any progress anyway. He revisited his old list of flings, girls who wanted to throw sympathy at him, having heard what happened, and he was all too happy to let them pity him by offering sexual favors. It was a Wednesday night when there was a knock on his door. He figured it was Alexis. She'd brought him chicken soup twice so far, something that amused Remy since he wasn't sick, but for some reason she thought chicken soup would make him feel better. She was who blond jokes were about, but when Remy opened the door he saw an annoyed Julie. He gave her a drunk little grin and stepped aside to let her in. "It's messy. I don't get room service here." He teased. He was in a t-shirt and sweatpants and he tried to remember the last time he saw her. Two days ago? Maybe three? Longer? "How's mom? Still out?" He was waiting for the bad news, which he was certain would come sooner rather than later.

[JULIE BRADY]

Julie did everything she could to take care of Remy when he was released from the hospital. She helped him get food and bring it back to his apartment, staying until after he’d showered and eaten, just in case he needed her help with anything. He was quiet and she was patient, leaving when he turned down her offer to stay. It wasn’t until she left that she realized her own comforting needs hadn’t been met. Remy was too lost in his own pain and trauma to be worried about hers. Part of her longed for his comfort, needing someone who had been through it all to reassure her that it would never happen again, that everything was okay now; but Remy couldn’t give her that. She went to the next best option and found herself curled up on her mom’s couch, cuddling between her and Sophia while Luke kept a comforting hand on her shoulder from around her mother’s shoulders. It wasn’t quite the comfort that Remy could have provided, but it certainly helped. She was so glad to be able to curl up with her mom like this. It made her cry to know that Remy couldn’t do the same.

The next morning Julie headed into the office against her parents’ and Sophia’s advice to get started on what Remy had asked her to do. The sooner she finished it, the sooner she could take her own time off for healing. She went through the background check database and printed out every employee’s background check, including hers, Remy’s, and Caroline’s. Her mother was more than happy to bake up goods for the hospital staff and Bernadette gave her the times for the shift changes in the ICU. She arranged with her mom to start delivering the goods that evening to continue for the next few days. Twice she tried to call Remy, but he either didn’t hear his phone or he was ignoring her calls. With a heavy heart, she buried herself in work again. By two o’clock she was done with the memo about the random drug tests and she sent it to everyone. She left a printed copy on Remy’s desk for whenever he decided to come in. Her whole body ached with exhaustion and she decided to call it a day soon after. By the time Remy arrived, she was already on her way to the bakery to help deliver goods.

At the hospital, she forced a smile for the nurses at the desk, insisting that the cupcakes were on the Remington for their hard work helping Caroline. The staff was most appreciative and it actually did make Julie happy to see everyone enjoy her mother’s cupcakes so much. Cora left her in Caroline’s room but only after Julie had promised not to stay all night. Within the hour Remy was joining her and Julie was relieved to see he was okay, if not hung over. She hugged him when he walked in and stayed throughout his visit. He insisted she come home with him and she couldn’t deny the request. She would do anything if it would help him feel better. Of course Remy was as miserable out of the hospital as he was in it, but Julie patiently cared for him without complaint. They ate together and drank together, but Remy got far more wasted than she did. He passed out fondling her and she cried herself to sleep, praying to any higher being that would listen that Caroline and Remy would make it through this in one piece. When she woke, it was to the feeling of Remy pulling her tightly into him. His warmth lulled her back to sleep for a time, enjoying his silent comfort. Eventually she woke again and had sloppy sex with her grieving partner before he drowned himself again in alcohol. She insisted he pick up the phone when she called later, and though she left with his promise, he didn’t uphold it. That’s where her ability to comfort stagnated for days.

Julie didn’t even see Remy at the hospital. Every time she went now, Mr. Graham would be there to make small talk with, fretting over his comatose wife. And every time she would have to tell him that she had no updates on his son. Obviously, Remy wasn't talking to him either. She went through finalizing a guard service to be stationed at the front desk to start the following Monday before she took the rest of the week off. It was hard to walk out of her apartment in the morning, afraid she would be targeted again by one of Hector’s friends. She didn’t know what connections he had and the more she thought about it, the more frightened she became. Thankfully she was staying at her parents’ house until she felt safe enough to return to her own apartment. Every evening she visited Caroline, though, getting all of the updates on her condition. She was stabilized, at least, which meant she wasn’t getting any worse. At least twice a day she tried to call Remy but he never picked up; she texted him too, but to no avail. Soon her worry was eating at her and she resolved to go to his house to check on him. He could ignore her all he wanted, but she knew where the man lived. There were only so many places in this city that he could hide. Walking down the hallway of Remy’s apartment building, she had been digging in her purse when she looked up and stopped cold. There was a pretty blonde standing at Remy’s door with a couple cans in her hand. The door opened and Remy sounded a happy greeting. The girl brought him chicken soup to make him feel better…and then she walked right in at Remy’s invitation. It was like a slap in the face followed by a punch to the gut. All these days Remy had been ignoring her, but this girl brings him chicken soup and she’s allowed in with a cheerful greeting? She hovered around the corner a full hour before the blonde came back out looking tousled with a flush in her cheeks. Tears stung in her eyes as she hurried away from the apartment. All this time she thought Remy was only with her. How stupid could she be? After everything she had done for him, that they had been through together, it meant nothing to him. She should have expected that all along.

A long night ensued for Julie. She was caught between forgiving Remy and feeling betrayed. They had never said they were exclusive, but Julie had assumed after all these months, Remy had lost interest in other women. She was satisfied with their arrangement under the belief that he must have been falling for her if he’d been fucking around with her this long. What a naïve way for her to think…she should have known Remy couldn’t change. But if that was the case, when he was vulnerable, of course he was going to revert back to his old ways. She hated rationalizing his behavior, but she couldn’t really justify staying mad at the man. He was hurting and this was how he dealt with it. She would just have to make him feel better then. But the only way she could do that was to go back to his apartment since he wasn’t answering any of her calls or texts.

When she came to his door that afternoon, Julie was ready to give him a stern talking to before forgiving his transgressions against her. He needed to know how much he was hurting her and how much she just wanted to help him. If he pushed her away, she’d go without a second thought, but she had to give him at least a chance to accept her help. Her knuckles rapped on the door sharply. It felt like forever, but eventually the door opened to a drunk Remy in a T-shirt and sweat pants. His sloppy grin actually annoyed her. “It’s messy. I don’t get room service here.” He stepped out of the way to let her in and Julie entered with an irritated glance at her lover. He looked like shit and a pang of guilt shot through her at being so angry with him. “How’s mom? Still out?” Julie turned to him as he shut the door, her brow furrowed in confusion and disbelief. “You haven’t gone to visit her in the last few days?” He answered in the affirmative and Julie sighed heavily, caught between pitying him and being angry with him. She knew it must be hard for him to see his mother in such a state, but he was Caroline’s only child—the least he could do was talk to her for a few minutes every day to encourage her recovery. “She’s fine. No big changes, but the doctor says she’s healing well. The infection isn’t getting any worse and her fever doesn’t go above a hundred and one anymore. He believes she’s through the worst of it.” Remy seemed satisfied with the update and walked right past her into his apartment. She followed him with short, angry steps.

The place really was a mess. He wasn’t picking up after himself and it stank. Immediately she set to work clearing take-out boxes off his coffee table, dumping them in the nearest trashcan. “Remy, this is gross even for you.” Her voice was exasperated but gentle as she pitied him a little more with every piece of garbage she cleared away. That was until she came across three condom wrappers torn into, lying on the carpet beside his couch. With a sick feeling in her stomach, she straightened and looked from the foil to the man standing nearby. There was hurt and anger in her bright blue eyes as she glared at him in disbelief. “Really? You can’t pick up your goddamn phone for me, but you can fuck one or five other girls while I’m worrying about you?” He made like he was going to try and calm her down and she pushed past him to the trashcan. “I saw the cute blonde who came by here yesterday, by the way. I’m guessing by the cans of chicken soup she had in her hands that she wasn’t a hooker.” She hated that she was nagging, but she couldn’t help but be bitter about being ignored for another woman. Spinning around from the trashcan, she crossed her arms tightly over her small chest, glaring at Remy. “How many other girls are helping you get over your trauma, hm? Have you ignored any of them since this happened, or are you just ignoring me?” Her whole body was screaming anger and frustration with Remy, but on the inside she was fighting back tears. After everything she’d done to help him and this was the thanks she got…

[REMY GRAHAM]

“You haven’t gone to visit her in the last few days?” He rolled his shoulders, a stupid, almost amused look on his face. "Can't drive with my bum arm." It was a stupid excuse, they both knew it, but she wasn't going to fight with him. She sighed and he could see the anger on her angelic face. “She’s fine. No big changes, but the doctor says she’s healing well. The infection isn’t getting any worse and her fever doesn’t go above a hundred and one anymore. He believes she’s through the worst of it.” He was relieved to hear that and nodded, not having much else to say on the matter. He wasn't optimistic about her recovery, though, and he couldn't bear to see her in that condition. That was the real reason he was avoiding the hospital. His mother had always been a fighter, someone who would yell on the phone for an hour to save her company literally $50, and to see her so helpless and lifeless on a bed.. it was more than he could handle. It was easier to pretend she was at work.

Remy moved past Julie and went towards the sofa, grabbing a half drunk bottle of water from the counter and chugging the rest of it. He could hear Julie following him, his eyes moving to watch her pick up his trash. It was all he could do to not roll his eyes at her. “Remy, this is gross even for you.” She sounded exasperated and he sighed, pulling the empty bottle from his lips and tossing it towards the can she was trying to fill with his garbage. He missed and the bottle clattered to the floor with the rest of the trash. She looked up at him in disbelief and he raised his brows trying to look innocent, opening his mouth to tell her he would pick it up when she spoke first. “Really? You can’t pick up your goddamn phone for me, but you can fuck one or five other girls while I’m worrying about you?” His deep blue eyes flashed on the condom wrappers and he sighed heavily, running his hand over his face, giving her a pleading look and opening his mouth to attempt to smooth things over, but she snapped at him before he had the chance. “I saw the cute blonde who came by here yesterday, by the way. I’m guessing by the cans of chicken soup she had in her hands that she wasn’t a hooker.” It actually took a lot for him not to laugh about Alexis and the soup. God, she was an idiot. A beautiful, air headed idiot. “How many other girls are helping you get over your trauma, hm? Have you ignored any of them since this happened, or are you just ignoring me?” She was angry, and he knew she had every right to be. They had been hooking up and Julie probably thought she was the only one. Truth be told, he'd been working so much that she pretty much was the only girl he saw these days. In fact he hadn't been with anyone else for nearly two months before the hold-up at the hotel.

"I wasn't ignoring you." He defended, his voice surprisingly gentle and it was obvious that he was trying to smooth things over and calm her down. He was tipsy, though, and not in the right state of mind to be doing something like this. "See, Jules? This is why I can't have you around right now. You're just so.. Jesus Christ, your a fucking saint, you know?" His nose wrinkled like she would completely understand what he was getting at. "I mean, you come in here all lecturey, cleaning up after me, moming me around about what a fucking mess I've made and then clean up after me. You.. Fuck, Jules.. you just want to take care of me and be sad with me and want someone to console you and you want to console me but that's not what I fucking want. What I want is to get shit faced and pretend this whole god damned thing never happened, and you.. you can't make that happen." He wasn't trying to hurt her, and in his state he didn't think he was, but the look on her face said otherwise. "Come on, Jules.. you know you're too good for me. Don't be so surprised I'm such a fuck up. You've known it for years." He slumped into his chair and reached for a beer bottle, sighing when he realized it was empty. Why did it need to be empty?

[JULIE BRADY]

It was like Remy deflated in front of Julie’s eyes and she knew she’d caught him in something he was trying to hide from her. How many girls had he been with since they had begun their tryst? “I wasn’t ignoring you.” His voice was gentle, attempting to soothe her, but it only drew a huffed breath from her. How could he say he hadn’t been ignoring her? He hadn’t answered any of her calls or texts! “See, Jules? This is why I can’t have you around right now. You’re just so…Jesus Christ, you’re a fucking saint, you know?” Julie gave him an annoyed and confused look. What was he getting at? The look he gave her said she should know what he was talking about and it only annoyed her more. “I mean, you come here all lecturey, cleaning up after me, moming me around about what a fucking mess I’ve made and then clean up after me. You…Fuck, Jules…you just want to take care of me and be sad with me and want some to console you and you want to console me but that’s not what I fucking want. What I want is to get shit faced and pretend this whole god damned thing never happened, and you…you can’t make that happen.” If Remy sleeping with other girls was a stab in her gut, turning her kindness against her was twisting the knife. Julie’s face fell and her eyebrows knit together in a hurt, defeated look. All this time she had tried to do everything she could to help Remy but he wanted nothing to do with her. She hurt him more with just her presence. That was a hard pill to swallow and she let her eyes drop to the floor, gulping back her tears.

“Come on, Jules…you know you’re too good for me. Don’t be so surprised I’m such a fuck up. You’ve known it for years.” Remy reached for an empty beer bottle, sighing in exasperation and Julie suddenly felt a fire in her gut. She stomped forward until she was standing in front of him, putting her hands on her hips as her lip pouted angrily. “You are a fuck up, Remy. You’re fucking up everything your mom wants for you.” She snatched the beer bottle out of his hand and turned to slam in down on the coffee table behind her. When she turned back around, she gave Remy a stern look that would have reminded her of one of Caroline’s looks if she had the opportunity to see herself. “You think she would want you to sit around drinking yourself into a stupor, living out of takeout boxes and fucking any girl that comes offering sympathy sex?” The look he gave her made her pause and she huffed a sigh instead of letting out the rest of her lecture. Holding in her frustration, she turned away to snatch up more garbage from his coffee table and floor. When she had loaded up her arms, she stomped over to the trashcan and dumped everything in, hardly caring how much noise she made. Just seeing Remy sulking in his chair when she turned back around burned a hole in her belly.

For a while she continued to pick up his mess, huffing back and forth from the trashcan until all of the big pieces were cleared away. He still needed to vacuum and wipe crumbs and stains off of multiple surfaces, but she didn’t have the patience to deal with it. As it was, she was pissed Remy was still pouting in his chair, ignoring her. What she had bottled up before came spilling out as she came to a stop in front of him. “Your dad asks me about you every time I go to the hospital to visit your mom. And every time he asks I have to tell him I haven’t heard from you either. I’ve never seen the man look so sad as he has the last few days. Your mom wouldn’t want you to abandon him right now!” His deep blue eyes came to hers and she let her own eyes blaze down into his. Still he had nothing to say for himself! Was he that selfish? “At least one of us is doing what your mom wants! She asked me to take care of you, and that’s what I’m doing! I’m sorry if that interrupts your plans to ignore the rest of the world and the people who care about you!” Yelling at Remy wouldn’t solve the problem, but damn did it feel good right now.

[REMY GRAHAM]

“You are a fuck up, Remy. You’re fucking up everything your mom wants for you.” His eyes were pleading with her to just leave him alone. That's all he wanted, was to be left alone to wallow in his own misery while his arm healed. Every time he moved it he was reminded of what happened and what his mother was going through right now. He didn't want to think about that, though. He wanted to simply forget it all. It was so much easier that way. Julie snatched the empty bottle from his hand and slammed it on the coffee table before rearing back around towards him, giving him one of her famous stern Julie glares. She definitely learned that one from his mom. “You think she would want you to sit around drinking yourself into a stupor, living out of takeout boxes and fucking any girl that comes offering sympathy sex?” What mother would want that for her child? Was this a trick question? His brow raised, his lips pouty and his eyes sad. What did she want him to say? He liked the sympathy sex. Julie huffed and turned away, not at all pleased with his lack of an answer, and began picking up his trash.

There was a part of Remy that felt bad for all of this. He didn't want Julie there to clean up after him, which was precisely why he'd shut her out. He would eventually come to his senses, once he'd finished pitying himself, but until that time he didn't want Julie to witness his downfall. He would have apologized later, but she didn't give him the chance to let it get to that point, and now she was there forcing him to feel guilty for something he wasn't ready to feel guilty about. The cleaning came to a sudden halt as Julie stopped in front of him once more. Glossy, red eyes moved up her lean frame until they met her own stormy eyes. “Your dad asks me about you every time I go to the hospital to visit your mom. And every time he asks I have to tell him I haven’t heard from you either. I’ve never seen the man look so sad as he has the last few days. Your mom wouldn’t want you to abandon him right now!” He fought the urge to roll his eyes. How like her to try and make him feel guilty. He was the real victim here! “At least one of us is doing what your mom wants! She asked me to take care of you, and that’s what I’m doing! I’m sorry if that interrupts your plans to ignore the rest of the world and the people who care about you!” Her voice was raising with every word until she was flat out yelling at him, which was when something inside of Remy finally snapped.

"Who the fuck do you think you are barging in here and trying to make me feel more like shit than I already do?" He spat, his fists clenched as his face moved inches away from hers. He had to fight the urge not to hit her, not the type to ever hit a woman, but God did she make his blood boil! "I don't want you taking care of me! If I wanted to be taken care of I'd be answering your calls. Get a clue, Jules! I'm a grown ass man, and maybe you don't think I'm acting like one, but it's not your place to tell me what to do. Fuck the promise you made my mother, she's going to be dead soon anyway!" His voice cracked as the emotion and anger hit him full force, his blue eyes watering slightly from pain and fury. He suddenly saw a flash before his eyes as his face was jerked to the side, her blow catching him completely by surprise. He didn't realize she'd slapped him until his cheek began to sting. Remy put a hand to the sore spot, shocked by the action, and when he pulled his hand away he saw the slight traces of blood. Had she scratched him? He looked back at her, rage making him see red. His body tensed and his nostrils flared at the unapologetic look she offered. He had to mentally stop himself from slapping her back. There were so many harsh words that came to his mind, so many terrible things he wanted to say to knock her down, but he bit his tongue. Deep down he knew she was coming from a place of caring, but she had taken this too far. "Get out." He snarled, turning away from her and storming to his bedroom. He slammed the door hard enough for the walls to shake, an empty bottle of whiskey falling off the side table in the hall by his room and shattering. He didn't need this right now.

[JULIE BRADY]

Julie’s heart thudded in her chest as Remy stood from his chair and brought his angry face close to hers. “Who the fuck do you think you are barging in here and trying to make me feel more like shit than I already do?” A pang of guilt shot through her chest, but it quickly disappeared. How else was she going to get him out of his shitty funk? “I don’t want you taking care of me! If I wanted to be taken care of I’d be answering your calls. Get a clue, Jules! I’m a grown ass man, and maybe you don’t think I’m acting like one, but it’s not your place to tell me what to do. Fuck the promise you made to my mother, she’s going to be dead soon anyway!” Julie could see the tears brimming in Remy’s eyes, but she was too furious with his hurtful yelling to pay them any mind. Her hand swiped at his face before she could stop it. The palm of her hand stung and her nails raked across his cheek, leaving three trails on the reddening skin. In the silence that followed, she watched the blood peek out from under the skin, Remy’s shocked eyes coming to her own defiant ones. Her breath was coming quickly through her nose, her blood boiling. He didn’t want her to help? Fine! But he wasn’t going to yell at her like that! And he wasn’t going to condemn his mother to die! As he glared back at her, his nostrils flaring in a way she’d never seen before, she was sure he was going to hit her back. Instead, he simply glared at her for a tense several seconds while tears watered in her eyes. She hurt for him, but she hurt for herself too. All she wanted to do was help him, but he couldn’t let her do that. He couldn’t be unselfish enough to let her do what she needed to heal. No one could give her what she needed—reassurance that everything would go back to the way it was.

“Get out.” She’d never heard Remy snarl like that before and she watched with a sinking gut as he stormed away from her. Like a blustering child, he went straight for his room and slammed the door as hard as he could. It shook an empty bottle of whiskey from the side table in the hall and it shattered on the floor. Julie watched as the amber liquid seeped across the floor, tears running down her cheeks. The nurturing part of her that still cared about Remy wanted to clean it up to make sure he wouldn’t cut himself on the glass when he came stumbling out later. But the bigger part of her that was furious with his selfishness decided if he didn’t want her help, then he didn’t deserve it. Turning on her heel, she grabbed her coat and purse and headed straight for the door. She slammed it behind her almost as hard as Remy had slammed his bedroom door and she stormed from the complex with bitter hurt and anger stinging tears into her eyes. How could she have ever thought he gave a shit about her? If he did, he wouldn’t treat her like this! He wouldn’t ignore the fact that she was hurting too! She soothed her hurt by blasting Alanis Morrisette on the way home, pounding the steering wheel to the rhythm of the drums. It didn’t heal her, and it still made her heart heavy when she thought about it throughout the weekend, but at least it took the sting away for a brief few minutes.

By the time Monday rolled around, Julie wondered if maybe she had been too harsh on Remy. The man was grieving for his mother’s condition and she should have been more understanding. Hell, she would be a fucking wreck too if her mother was hurt as bad as Caroline was. She would have been by her mother’s side day and night, but still a wreck nonetheless. Just because Remy wasn’t beside his mother, though, didn’t mean he didn’t love her, and Julie knew that. She was determined to apologize, albeit reluctantly, and maybe he would do the same. Maybe in time she could forget about those condom wrappers too. It wasn’t like it should have been a surprise anyway. Remy had always been the type to hide between a woman’s legs when he didn’t know how to deal with something. And with everything that had happened between them in the last several days, she couldn’t really blame him for remembering their trauma whenever he saw her. Maybe what she had said would wake him up some. If he showed up for work today, she would take it as a good sign. She was down at the front desk checking in on the new security guards, chatting with a smile when she happened to look over at the people walking through the door. Immediately her smile faded and her eyes widened, her stomach dropping to the floor. It was Remy, alright…with some pretty girl hanging on his arm, her long legs sprouting out from the ridiculously short dress she was wearing with the heavy, faux fur coat hanging open and down past the hem of her dress. Julie felt like the world stopped. Did Remy want her to see him flaunting another woman?

[REMY GRAHAM]

Remy heard the telltale door slam that told him that Julie had left his home. For a moment he thought he'd hear her cleaning up the shattered glass on the ground, but no such luck. He told himself he would do it later and laid down on the bed, flipping the TV on to drown out the anger bouncing in his head. In the end he fell asleep and when he woke and left his room, he'd forgotten about the bottle and cut his foot. It only added fuel to his fire. Despite his frustration with Julie and her inability to back off, he did listen to some of what she said. Remy visited his mother over the weekend and was glad that Julie wasn't there to see her handiwork in getting him to cooperate. He made sure to be sober, too, and it was a good thing since he did end up running into his father, who he ended up getting a cup of coffee with after his visit. The rest of the weekend was a bit of a blur with Remy unsure of what to do. He was enjoying his downward spiral but knew sooner or later he would have to climb back out from the gutter he was pushing himself face first into. He would have to run this hotel and face the fact that his mother was going to be gone, but he couldn't bring himself to really think about it. In fact, every time it all crossed his mind he busied himself with something else, like drinking, television or women. He felt guilty for having the other girls around, really only wanting Julie there, but at the same time he didn't want Julie there to see him be so pathetic. The girls that came over were stupid and easy, they would baby him in all the ways he liked. When he was ready for the firm hand, it was Julie he would call, but even he knew he'd fuck it all up before that even happened.

By the time Monday rolled around, Remy was getting tired of seeing his own home. He missed the luxury of the hotel where he could get a maid in to clean up after him and not give him a guilt trip at the same time, and have food cooked and practically brought to his bed. Plus the bar was downstairs and he could easily get drunk and wander his way back upstairs. He didn't care much about the image he was trying to uphold. The only people who knew who he was were the bars staff, and even then most of them wouldn't recognize him until they looked at his credit card.

When he walked through The Remington's front doors he thought it was much earlier than it actually was. He'd been out all night drinking with Angie, who for some weird reason like when Remy called her Angel during sex, and then got some breakfast with her which included bloody marys. He was more than a little tired and just wanted to crash in his bed with Angie's mouth worshiping him, but when he walked through the front doors the hotel was buzzing with activity. Not lots, but more than it should for four or five in the morning like he thought it was. Somehow they managed to stay at breakfast for longer than he thought and it was much closer to seven. Angie held tight to his arm, clearly pleased with who she was being seen with, while Remy fished in his wallet for his key. He peaked up at the front desk as he walked past and nearly tripped when he saw two clear, baby blue eyes piercing his. His feet faltered for a moment and Angie looked over at him, but his eyes were locked on Julie's. He hadn't expected her to be there, which was evident on his face, guilt suddenly sweeping through him. He was angry with her, but his intention wasn't now, nor had it ever been, to hurt her. He knew Angie being toted upstairs would certainly be hurtful.

"You okay?" The girl asked, pulling Remy's eyes back to hers. He blinked at the concerned, naive look on her youthful face. Angie would always just be a trophy wife. She was practically bred for it. He plastered on a fake smile which seemed to ease her. "Yeah, baby, fine. Uhh.. let's go on up to bed." The answer seemed to please her and she smiled wide. Remy averted his eyes from the front desk, bee lining to the elevators and climbing on board with his slut in tow.

Remy didn't fall asleep as quickly as he wanted to, and when he had it wasn't completely restful. Seeing that look on Julie's face had made him feel guilty, even if it hadn't stopped him from continuing on his nowhere path. When he did finally wake he showered and got dressed in clean clothes. He gave Angie money for a cab and told her he needed to get some work done, but he'd call soon. She pouted but finally left, leaving Remy to figure out what to do next. He got some food downstairs at the kitchen, avoiding the nasty glares from Julie's Latina friend and hoping his food wasn't tainted, and then made his way to the office. How many workers had seen his fling that morning? He didn't care all that much about his appearance, everyone knew he'd been a playboy so it should come to no surprise. He'd been using the hotel as his personal fuck pad for years. His goal wasn't to actually do work, but to talk to Julie. He didn't like how things had ended with her, but he wasn't sure how to fix their situation since he wasn't entirely ready to come back. Without having an actual plan set in place he made his way to Julie's office, knocked and let himself in. She was none too pleased to see him but he tried to ignore the look she gave. "Has security been hired?" She confirmed they had and he nodded, folding his arms and looking to his toes. His eyebrows knit and he sighed before looking back up at her. "I'm sorry for how things ended last week when you came by." He told her softly, shutting her door and taking a step closer. "Look, I don't want you to hate me Jules, I'm just.. not dealing really well right now, obviously, and I just didn't want you to witness any of this. I had hoped I could save some amount of face if you just didn't see me do this stupid shit." He swallowed and then sighed running a hand through his hair. "And.. I didn't know you would see me bringing Angie in. You, uh.. weren't supposed to see that.."

[JULIE BRADY]

From the surprise on Remy’s face, he hadn’t meant for Julie to see him with the slut on his arm. But there they were, eyes locked across the expanse of the lobby, and Julie could feel her throat closing up. It was one thing to know Remy was having sex with other women from the evidence he left lying around, but seeing him with another woman was something completely different. The whore said something to Remy, drawing his eyes from Julie’s and she realized they were burning. Her eyes followed the pair as they bee-lined for the elevators, fury and hurt churning violently in her gut. She couldn’t be here. Tears were glistening in her eyes and she needed to get out of sight. With a small forced smile, Julie looked back to the guards and stuttered a rushed word of apology as she excused herself. She headed right for the kitchens.

Thank God Sophia was there. Julie was barely able to hide the tears streaming down her pale cheeks as she rushed past every other person in the kitchen, keeping her eyes fixed on her best friend. Sophia turned around with a smile, but upon seeing Julie’s distraught face, she immediately hurried to her side. Julie knew other people could see her tears, but they didn’t ask questions, only watched with worried eyes as Sophia led her to the back door and outside. Before Julie could even sob, Sophia had her arms locked around her in a tight embrace. For a while Julie just cried into Sophia’s warm shoulder, sobbing and clinging to her best friend. When she had calmed, she explained what happened to Sophia. The Latina was pissed and Julie had to talk her down from jumping Remy in the parking lot. It wasn’t like Remy was Julie’s boyfriend. They were lovers, nothing more. She shouldn’t have expected any more from him. Hadn’t she known this would happen someday? But it was now that she realized she’d hoped for more with Remy. She had hoped he was changing, hoped he would be able to make her his one and only, hoped they would find some kind of romantic happy ending. Some delusional part of her had thought maybe, just maybe, she could change him. What a silly child she’d been. Sophia lifted her spirits with reassurances that she would find better and that Remy would know soon enough how badly he’d fucked up. Julie sincerely hoped he would.

When Julie did get back to work, she threw smiles to those in the kitchen that turned to gaze worriedly at her. They smiled in return, reassured that she was alright. Nobody asked questions and Julie was grateful for it. She went back to her office and set hard to work. Anything to take her mind off the events of the morning. The minutes flew by as she breezed through her work. Her door was closed to hide her puffy eyes when she first returned to her office, but by early afternoon she was fine. A couple people came to her door to ask questions, which she received amiably, and they left the door closed behind them to give her privacy. Everyone was still very sensitive to her feelings after the events of the last couple weeks and she sincerely appreciated it. When another knock came to the door, she didn’t think much of it when she called out for the person to come in. But when her eyes lifted from her computer screen, her stomach went crashing to the floor and her face went stony. There Remy was, as disheveled as ever. He looked almost nervous and she was glad for it.

“Has security been hired?” She nodded tersely. “Yes. They’re stationed at the front desk and do sweeps of each floor every hour and monitor the security cameras constantly.” He nodded and looked down at his toes as if there was an answer there. She knew he was working up to something and let a layer of ice settle over her heart. Nothing he said was going to make what she witnessed okay. “I’m sorry for how things ended last week when you came by.” He shut the door and stepped closer to her desk and she practically bristled. What lame excuse was he going to make for himself? “Look, I don’t want you to hate me Jules, I’m just…not dealing really well right now, obviously, and I just didn’t want you to witness any of this. I had hoped I could save some amount of face if you just didn’t see me do this stupid shit.” How could he ask her to simply stand by as he tore himself apart over his mother’s hospitalization? He knew she cared about his well-being. She tried to understand where he was coming from, knowing that what he was going through was an incredibly difficult burden to bear. But that didn’t make it okay for him to hurt her! His hand ran through his coal black hair as he sighed. “And…I didn’t know you would see me bringing Angie in. You, uh…weren’t supposed to see that…” She visibly winced, a reaction she had hoped to hide. Her hand waved in front of her so he would know she’d heard enough. When their eyes met again, hers were cool and professional, her brow furrowed. “I don’t need to know her name, Remy. In fact, I didn’t even need to know she existed. But you know what? I’m glad I know about her. It’s reminded me of who you are.” She clasped her hands in front of her and turned in her chair so she was fully facing him. “I forgot that this is what you do. You sabotage anything good in your life to maintain your unattached, carefree lifestyle. For the last several months you actually fooled me into thinking maybe you had changed. But I suppose you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, can you?” Her tone was cold, detached while she threw words that she hoped would cut him like the dagger he’d forced into her gut that morning. She wished the nonchalant smile would come to her lips, but it simply wouldn’t.

“I’m sorry for what’s happened to your mother, Remy. It hurts deep when I put myself in your shoes and think about what I would do if it were my mother who was fighting for her life. Nobody deserves to experience you’re going through, except for maybe the men who put you in this situation.” She tucked her hair behind her ears before clasping her hands once more and stifling the anger that bubbled in her gut. “But what I wouldn’t do is selfishly assume I was the only one suffering. You weren’t the only one affected by that robbery, Remy.” The anger was leaking out and burning in her blue eyes as they met his. “When I do sleep, I wake up in a cold sweat, still feeling the gun pressed to the back of my head. I dream of all the terrible things they had planned for me and for you. Walking out in the parking lot in the dark, I’m constantly looking over my shoulder. I spend as much time as I can up here in the office because at least here I know I’m safe.” Tears were burning in her eyes as her hands clenched together, trying to keep herself from trembling. “And yet I’ve been here, running the ship while your father sits by your mom’s bedside and you indulge yourself in pretending like we don’t exist. I visit your mother every day and worry about whether you’re safe because God forbid you give me some piece of mind. While you’ve been busy burying yourself between the legs of who knows how many women, drowning yourself in bottle after bottle, I’ve been trying to keep myself from falling apart so I can make sure your mother’s business doesn’t collapse.” Tears were dripping down her face at this point, the hurt etched on her face. “Did you ever once think outside of yourself enough to consider that maybe I needed your help too? That maybe I needed to be comforted by someone who was there by my side through the worst day of my life? That maybe I needed a chance to fall apart too?” Her mother and Luke and Sophia had been wonderful support through everything, but only Remy could have given her what she needed. Remy had been wallowing in his self-pity and misery for weeks, forcing her to glue what little pieces she could of herself back together. Not once had she been able to mourn the loss of her own innocence. Everyone around her was able to do it except for the once person that had brought an end to the robbery and it made her feel like the most isolated person on the planet. Now it seemed she was doomed to be on her own island forever, unable now to forget how deeply Remy had hurt her. It only made the tears flow faster, tears that Remy had caused and couldn’t wipe away.

[REMY GRAHAM]

Her look was cool and professional, but Remy knew immediately it was just a front. She was hurt. There was no possible way Julie could turn the switch off so quickly. He’d hurt her, even he knew that, though she had hurt him too. No way Julie was over it already, and he would probably hear an earful despite the collected look she kept. “I don’t need to know her name, Remy. In fact, I didn’t even need to know she existed. But you know what? I’m glad I know about her. It’s reminded me of who you are.” His jaw tensed at her words. Her hands clasped and she looked at him like he was no more than a nuisance. “I forgot that this is what you do. You sabotage anything good in your life to maintain your unattached, carefree lifestyle. For the last several months you actually fooled me into thinking maybe you had changed. But I suppose you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, can you?” Remy felt his hands ball into fists at his side as he glowered at her slightly. He knew she had a right to be upset. They had been sort of exclusive for some time, but they weren’t actually dating, and she had known what kind of person he was prior to getting involved. Truth was he had changed, though. A lot, and it was mostly due to Julie, but of course she would give him absolutely no credit now. She wasn’t going to look past his transgressions to see the bigger picture of how he’d put his childish behavior behind him prior to all of this, and his actions recently shouldn’t reflect on him the way she was making them. He didn’t sabotage everything and he didn’t want the carefree lifestyle he’d had. That wasn’t why he was doing what he was doing. It was because he was lost and hurt and scared and overwhelmed with grief. He’d told her he wished she hadn’t witnessed any of this and he’d meant it, but what she didn’t know was that it was because he did care so much about her and he wanted so desperately for her to not know this pathetic part of him still existed.

“I’m sorry for what’s happened to your mother, Remy. It hurts deep when I put myself in your shoes and think about what I would do if it were my mother who was fighting for her life. Nobody deserves to experience you’re going through, except for maybe the men who put you in this situation. But what I wouldn’t do is selfishly assume I was the only one suffering. You weren’t the only one affected by that robbery, Remy.” He’d never thought he was the only one affected and again he felt his own annoyance bubble forward. She was making this about her when it wasn’t, about her needs being equal to his. How could he hold her hand when he couldn’t hold his own head up half the time? “When I do sleep, I wake up in a cold sweat, still feeling the gun pressed to the back of my head. I dream of all the terrible things they had planned for me and for you. Walking out in the parking lot in the dark, I’m constantly looking over my shoulder. I spend as much time as I can up here in the office because at least here I know I’m safe.” Her voice cracked ever so slightly as tears brimmed at her eyes. He glared at the ground between them, hating her for doing this to him, for trying to make him feel guilty, but he understood why. He resented her and respected her for saying her mind. “And yet I’ve been here, running the ship while your father sits by your mom’s bedside and you indulge yourself in pretending like we don’t exist. I visit your mother every day and worry about whether you’re safe because God forbid you give me some piece of mind. While you’ve been busy burying yourself between the legs of who knows how many women, drowning yourself in bottle after bottle, I’ve been trying to keep myself from falling apart so I can make sure your mother’s business doesn’t collapse. Did you ever once think outside of yourself enough to consider that maybe I needed your help too? That maybe I needed to be comforted by someone who was there by my side through the worst day of my life? That maybe I needed a chance to fall apart too?”

Remy knew he should feel worse, that her words should cut him deeper than they actually did, but the truth was he was too frustrated by her needs and cold hearted assumptions about his behavior. He knew she needed to fall apart, he knew she wanted him to hold her close at night, chase her nightmares away, tell her it was okay, that he wouldn’t let anyone hurt her. He knew that Julie thought he was being the most selfish man on earth for hiding within himself, for ceasing to care about any needs other than his own, but the fact was he simply couldn’t bring himself to care about the hotel or her needs. He hid from her because he just couldn’t be what she wanted. He could never be the person she hoped he would, and though he did care for her, he couldn’t give her what she wanted. Remy was incapable of putting her needs before his when he felt so completely hopeless. And she didn’t know how he felt, because at the end of the day she got to go home to her normal family. She got to crawl into her mother’s arms, which was something he couldn’t have done even when his mother wasn’t knocking on deaths door. Her life has been plagued with hard work, but it was charmed in a way that Remy’s was not. He wasn’t simply mourning the soon to be death of his mother, but everything their relationship had lacked, things he couldn’t even try to remedy because now it was too late. Even if she survived he feared it was too late. Caroline wasn’t the warm and fuzzy type, and that reflected completely on Remy and his inability to be there for someone else when they were in need. Besides, he wouldn’t blame her for falling apart. She chose to move on, plagued by her fears.

“You’re right.” He finally said, hardening himself from the hurt he felt by her words. “It was unfair of me to lay so much responsibility on you.” His reddened eyes met hers as he croaked out his bitter words, too tired and angry to fight with her. He wasn’t about to battle with Julie about right and wrong and which one of them was more right and which was more wrong. It was a losing battle he didn’t have the energy to fight. “I’m sorry I’m not what you expected. I’m sorry this is how you had to find out what a worthless sack of shit I am.” He all but spat the last part, his eyes glossy from tears he refused to ever shed in her presence, hating that was exactly how she saw him, and maybe he had been as of late, but in general he had not been but none of that mattered now. “The damage is done now though, isn’t it?” It was a rhetorical question and he shook his head at her and swallowed. “I guess your feelings and fears just never made it on to my priority list, what with whores and drinking being so high up on it. Maybe if my dad gets shot I’ll be more courteous to your needs then, learn from all my mistakes this time around.” He turned, knowing his words were going to cut her, but he didn’t care. He’d come to attempt to make amends and instead he’d been greeted with nothing but contempt. Of course he couldn’t blame her for being upset, but he did blame her for the unrealistic expectations she had set out for him. “I’ll be in tomorrow. Take whatever time off you need.” He offered gruffly as he turned and headed for her office door.

[JULIE BRADY]

Remy’s silence seemed to stretch on forever while tears continued to slip down Julie’s pale cheeks. He looked frustrated and upset, but damn it, so was she! She had a right to feel the way she did. “You’re right.” It wasn’t what Julie expected to hear and her blue eyes widened, blinking a couple times. But his voice sounded so hardened…it wasn’t like him and it made her uneasy. “It was unfair of me to lay so much responsibility on you.” When their eyes met, his were flushed pink with tears that surprised her further. They didn’t flow freely like hers did, but his blue eyes gleamed with moisture. It made a tinge of guilt spark from her stomach. Why did she always feel like she was in the wrong when she expressed emotions that he didn’t want to hear? “I’m sorry I’m not what you expected. I’m sorry this is how you had to find out what a worthless sack of shit I am.” The guilt hardened into a knot in her throat. He wasn’t being fair. She had a right to be upset with him! Why did he have to turn her words against her so harshly? Why did he have to keep hurting her? She hadn’t called him a worthless sack of shit, she just wished his sadness wouldn’t make him so fucking selfish. Yet here he was, still being selfish, and making her feel like the bad guy. “The damage is done now though, isn’t it? I guess your feelings and fears just never made it on my priority list, what with whores and drinking being so high up on it. Maybe if my dad gets shot I’ll be more courteous to your needs then, learn from all my mistakes this time around.” The words cut her deep and her thin black eyebrows were heavy over her icy eyes. “Don’t say something like that, Remy!” she scolded harshly, her eyes filling with tears. His needs had been high on her priority list! Why was it so hard for him to do the same for her? Why couldn’t they look out for each other?

The man didn’t respond to her scolding, turning away instead and shuffling to her door with a cold back. “I’ll be in tomorrow. Take whatever time off you need.” Now she didn’t even want the time off, just to defy him. “Don’t worry, Remy. I’ll be here bright and early. I don’t need to wallow in my self-pity.” She all but spat the words, anger strangling her. Her phone rang as his hand touched the door handle. One look at the caller ID and she held up a hand. “Wait, Remy. It’s your dad.” Annoyed and wanting nothing more than to not have to look at Remy’s infuriating face, she quickly snatched up her phone and slid her thumb across the screen to take the call. The more Julie wondered why Mr. Graham was calling her, the more worry began gnawing at her stomach. “Hello Mr. Graham.” Her voice was smooth and kind once more, forcing politeness for the old man. “Thank goodness you answered your phone! I figured I would call you first since I can’t seem to get in touch with Remy these days. You’ve missed so much today.” He was talking so fast and it was completely unlike the calm, kind man she was used to. Was he upset or happy? “What happened, Mr. Graham?” she asked in a somewhat frantic voice. “She’s waking up! Caroline is waking up!” Julie’s eyes widened and she leaned over her desk more, floored by the wonderful news. “Really?!” she piped excitedly. “Yes! She’s responding to stimuli now and the doctor was able to lower her oxygen dependency from one hundred percent to sixty. He says it’s a very good sign that she’s on her way to waking up.” There were tears of relief in her eyes now and she sighed heavily, clutching a hand to her chest in utter relief. “Oh thank goodness…” she breathed. Caroline was going to be okay. “Will you tell Remy?” Julie’s eyes flashed to the man watching her anxiously now. “He’s actually in my office right now. I’ll tell him right away. And I’ll be there to see her tonight, as always.” When Mr. Graham spoke again, she couldn’t help but note the way his voice quavered just slightly. “Thank you, Julie. I know Caroline would be so touched by your support through all of this.” Julie’s eyes pooled with tears, but she simply smiled with the phone pressed to her ear. “She’s done so much for me. You all have. I’ll always support you and your family, Mr. Graham.” She looked up at Remy with her glistening eyes, wondering if the words she had just spoken weren’t something of a lie. How could she support a man who wanted nothing to do with her help? “But Remy looks anxious to hear the news, so for now I’ll say goodbye. I’ll see you tonight.” Mr. Graham said goodbye, thanking her again before they finally hung up. Julie put her phone on the desk and let her eyes meet Remy’s.

“Go see your mom. The doctor says she’s starting to wake up.” It looked like the news didn’t quite sink in at first as Remy simply stood there with a deer-in-the-headlights look. “She responding to stimuli and her oxygen dependency is down from one hundred percent to sixty. I don’t know how soon she’ll wake, but she will.” She tilted her head to the side slightly, one of her tears finally dripping down her cheek. “I told you she wasn’t going to die. She’s too strong for that.” Just like her son. It was a shame she couldn’t celebrate with him. The hurt between them was too deep now. She was caught between mourning the loss of her relationship with Remy and the sheer happiness she felt at Caroline’s improvement. Her fingers lightly brushed away the tears, tired of Remy seeing them. “Get out of here, Remy. Your mom and dad need you.” And she needed to not see his face anymore. It was tearing her to shreds and she couldn’t take it anymore.

[REMY GRAHAM]

“Don’t worry, Remy. I’ll be here bright and early. I don’t need to wallow in my self-pity.” Remy bristled with annoyance, already agitated with her but this pushed him over the edge. His entire body tensed as he approached the door, biting his tongue from saying something he would later regret, when she suddenly called out for him to stop. “Wait, Remy. It’s your dad.” He heard the annoyance in her voice and part of him wanted to storm out despite what she said, but he stopped with his hand on the doorknob, letting her answer the phone. "Hello Mr. Graham. What happened, Mr. Graham?” He turned to look at her, scowling as she talked to his father about his mother. Why wouldn't he call Remy first? “Really?! Oh thank goodness…” His interest was peaked and he watched with mixed feelings. She sounded relieved, but why? He'd lay into his dad later for not bothering to call him first, his own child, despite his reasons. If there was news he should hear it before Julie, or at least have the opportunity to. It hurt almost as much as Julie's jabs at him. “He’s actually in my office right now. I’ll tell him right away. And I’ll be there to see her tonight, as always. She’s done so much for me. You all have. I’ll always support you and your family, Mr. Graham.” It was hard not to feel bitter towards her as her blue eyes brimmed with happy tears, whatever good news there was still untold to him. “But Remy looks anxious to hear the news, so for now I’ll say goodbye. I’ll see you tonight.” She hung up the phone, the whites of her eyes pink with all the tears she'd shed. “Go see your mom. The doctor says she’s starting to wake up.”

Remy felt his stomach twist anxiously. His mother was waking up? He was frozen in his spot just watching her. Was she serious? Why wouldn't his father tell him? Why would Julie hear that first? And why was Julie, his coworker telling him and not his own family? “She responding to stimuli and her oxygen dependency is down from one hundred percent to sixty. I don’t know how soon she’ll wake, but she will.” Remy felt his heart racing, his chest tight as he struggled to breathe. Would she be alright? “I told you she wasn’t going to die. She’s too strong for that.” He fumed all over again, his lips forming into a thin, angry line. Julie couldn't have known she would be alright any more than he couldn't have known she wouldn't be. She just happened to be right and it infuriated him that she would throw that in his face. “Get out of here, Remy. Your mom and dad need you.” Part of him was furious with her, the other part relieved that his mother might not be dying after all. He hesitated a moment before opening her door and leaving, slamming it hard behind him in his frustration. Still as he left the office, averting his eyes to everyone who walked near, he felt relief truly begin to wash over him. Maybe he had prematurely assumed she wouldn't live. But she wasn't young, and injuries like that could very realistically lead to death. Her life would be nothing short of a miracle.

It was hard to drive to the hospital safely. He sped and cut people off, even running a red light, glad that Julie wouldn't be there until later that evening. It meant he wouldn't need to think of her for a few more hours. When he got there he rushed up to his mothers room, not bothering to stop for the visitor pass he knew he was supposed to have, and giving his father the cold shoulder when he arrived despite the good news. Caroline Graham was still unconscious when he entered the room but for the first time she was breathing completely on her own, a sight that made Remy's chest clench. She very well could be okay after all! It was nice seeing it with his own eyes, but when his father laid a hand on his shoulder Remy turned on him, shrugging the mans hand away forcefully. "You should have called me before Julie." He all but snarled, receiving a frown from his father. "You wouldn't have answered if I did." "That's not the point! I'm your son. She is my mother, not Julie's, and I should have heard before her, or at least been given the opportunity to have heard." He saw his dad take a deep breath, obviously torn by all of this. Remy knew he was right and the man could argue until he was blue in the face, but it wouldn't make any difference to him. "Perhaps if I didn't need to work so hard to get in touch with you I would have called you first. But it really doesn't matter. You were told and you're here, and you're mothers doing better! Don't ruin this moment, you should feel nothing but joy." But he didn't. He was angry and bitter by the way he'd been treated by everyone close to him. He'd needed his space to come to terms with things, and maybe he hadn't handled it with as much grace as one would hope, but that didn't mean everyone he cared about had a right to turn on him.

He'd been there nearly three hours, not saying more than a couple of words to his father, as he waited for his mother to rouse. He kept glancing at the clock, knowing Julie would be on her way shortly and the last thing he wanted was to see her. He decided to call it a night. No sense wasting his time sitting there when she wasn't going to wake, with a man he was less than pleased with and a woman on her way that would throw passive aggressive remarks his way about what a saint she'd been through this while he was wallowing in self pity. Remy was just sliding his coat on when he heard a soft moan from the bed. He and his father both turned their attention to Caroline as her head moved slowly from left to right, a quiet moan escaping her lips. Remyis lips parted and he moved closer, coming to the side of the bed and looking down with hopeful eyes. "Mom?" He asked cautiously, afraid of getting his hopes up. "Caroline.." Mr. Graham called softly, and her eyes opened, a strangled sound coming from Remy's throat as he watched, tears brimming at his deep blue eyes. "Mom, can you hear us?" He asked and Caroline took a deep breath before opening her eyes more, looking from Remy to his father and back again. "Where am I?" Remy couldn't remember feeling this relieved. His father used the nurse call button to alert the staff she had woken and it wasn't long before the nurses were in. Remy took a step back and let the professionals work, simply watching in the shadow of the room as everyone explained what had happened and how long she had been asleep. The doctors came in and did a full examination and just as things were beginning to settle down Julie arrived. Remy couldn't remember ever feeling so completely out of place and he went to his mother and promised he would be back in the morning when everything settled. He exchanged nothing more than a glance with Julie as he left the hospital room, making his way down to his car.

The beginning of the night was a normal one for Remy. At least normal in the sense that he'd done what he'd been doing every night for the last almost two weeks. He drank, invited some company, drank some more with his company, and finally took said company to bed, only he really didn't stop drinking and there were some pain killers involved. Instead of falling asleep like he normally would, he found himself wide awake, barely coherent, and stewing about Julie. Maybe he had been stewing in self pity, but she had been acting like a martyr the whole time. Then paranoia kicked in.. she wanted the hotel. She was going to use this against him, tell his mother what he'd been doing and she would fire him, promote Julie, and he'd be left out on his ass after his years of schooling and training for this job. He'd fucked up, he knew that, but he had no intention of it being a permanent thing. He would have come back when he was ready and worked hard, but with his shoulder still messed up and being beaten up over what had happened to his mother, he couldn't put his mind in the right place for work yet. But Julie.. Julie could. The more he thought about her, the angrier he grew, until it all finally came to a head. Remy, in his practically incoherent state, stumbled his way to the elevator, leaving the girl he had over in bed, and went down to the lobby. He insisted a cab be called for him, and in moments he was climbing into the back of a yellow taxi and heading to Julie's home. He sat in the back, angrily slurring to the driver about what he'd been through before finally throwing a twenty in the front and getting out at Julie's complex. He took an elevator to her floor, tripped his way to her door and pounded on it loudly, as though it weren't nearly three o'clock in the morning. "JULIE!" He yelled, slamming his palm against the door again. "OPEN A GODDAM D-DOOR!"

[JULIE BRADY]

Julie was drained. She couldn’t focus on her work for the rest of the day, her mind constantly darting back to Remy. Why did he have to make it like she was the bad guy? Maybe she had been too harsh with him…Wait, no! He’d deserved it! He’d treated her like shit through this whole ordeal! She had the right to get everything she was feeling off her chest. But she couldn’t help feeling guilty when she remembered the way he looked at her. She could have been more supportive. His mother was in the hospital and in a coma, fighting for her life. The more she reflected on that, the worse she felt. But her wounded pride left a bitter taste in her mouth and when she finally gave up trying to do her work, she had fallen into a sullen silence. As soon as she got into her car, she normally started it and turned on whatever music she was in the mood for at the time. This time she just sat there in silence, staring at the steering wheel like it would give her the comfort she needed. For the better part of an hour, she simply pondered everything. Tears rolled down her cheeks and she realized that maybe her relationship with Remy was over. They’d hurt each other now and it seemed like the wounds were just too deep to heal. He would go back to fucking his whores and she would go back to pretending like she didn’t notice. So many months of hoping she could change him, hoping he would be hers, were now swirling down a drain she didn’t think she could save it from.

When she reached the hospital at last, she was trying to force her mood to perk up. Caroline was going to be okay and that should have been enough to get her out of her unhappiness. Ultimately it did, but not in the way she was expecting. She was shocked at the doctors and nurses in Caroline’s room, hovering over her bed, but the most shocking thing was Caroline herself. Awake and alert, the woman was having a conversation with the doctor like her coma never happened. Her blue eyes were wide with shock as she paused just inside the doorway. Remy leaned over his mother and spoke a few words to her before brushing past Julie. Their eyes met briefly and she could see the displeasure on his face. Part of her wanted to reach out and stop him, insist that he stay; but her pride stayed her hand. Instead she looked back at his retreating form with sad eyes before Caroline spoke her name. She turned around once more and smiled wide at the big, warm smile the woman gave her. Waving her over to the bed, Caroline finally finished her conversation with the doctor. Julie cried again with bittersweet happiness that Caroline was there but guilt that she had chased off the woman’s son with just her presence. She gave Caroline an update on the business and Remy’s behavior, leaving out his dalliances and stating simply that he hadn’t handled everything well. Caroline thanked her for taking care of him and all Julie could do was smile and cry in return. She hadn’t taken care of him—Remy hadn’t let her take care of him and she’d thrown that back in his face in the end. Mr. Graham praised her to Caroline, telling the woman how she had been there every day while holding up the business and keeping tabs on Remy, but the praise actually hurt Julie. She hadn’t handled any of it very well and that realization was flooding her thoughts now. Caroline then reminisced about Julie’s actions during the robbery, praising her bravery, and it was all Julie could do to not run from the room screaming. What good was all of that when she couldn’t even help the one man she thought about the most? And what good was all of her hard work if she couldn’t keep herself from falling apart?

When Julie finally left the hospital, she cried the whole way home. Soon she was simply going to dry out from all of the tears she’d shed. Everything was falling apart around her when it should have been mending. Her very sanity was on the verge of cracking and she realized she might have to take those days off after all. She might even have to find a therapist…Just the thought of that appeared futile at the moment. She had messed everything up and there was no way to fix it. As soon as she got home, she changed into her pajamas and fell into bed, crying herself to sleep. Perhaps in the morning it would all be better…

It wasn’t sunlight she woke to, however. It was a loud banging on her door, the darkness of her bedroom pressing in on her. Was that the sound of a bare palm slapping against the door? “JULIE! OPEN A GODDAMN D-DOOR!” Remy’s voice sent electric shocks through her that immediately woke her up. She threw the covers off of her as she looked at the clock. It was almost three o’clock in the morning! What was he thinking, making all that racket?! She rushed to the door in her t-shirt and shorts, her black hair mussed from sleep and her blue eyes swollen from her tears. Squinting as she flipped the light in the hallway on, she rushed to the door as Remy continued to pound on it. “JULIE!” He yelled her name a second time just before she reached the door. She unlocked it quickly before throwing it open. Remy practically fell into her as he stumbled, obviously not expecting the door to open when it did. “What is wrong with you?! Are you trying to get me evicted?!” she hissed before she poked her head out into the hallway. A couple heads were glaring out of doorways and she waved nervously to them as a sign of apology. When she closed her door, she rounded on an obviously very drunk Remy. “What are you doing here? It’s almost three in the morning!” He began stuttering something and she huffed, taking his arm and leading him into the apartment more, dragging him towards the living room. “Please keep your voice down, you’ll wake the neighbors.” When they reached the living room, he snatched his arm away from her and she put her hands on her narrow hips. Frustrated, Julie could also feel the guilt bubbling up in her stomach again as she looked at the state Remy was in. “What do you want, Remy?” she asked in a quiet voice, only showing a little of her impatience.

[REMY GRAHAM]

The door unlocked and opened too quickly for Remy, and he stumbled as his balance was lost on the opening door. Miraculously he caught himself before tripping on the beautiful, startled girl who answered. “What is wrong with you?! Are you trying to get me evicted?!” He scoffed, moving past her into the apartment his anger flaring as he tried to remember exactly what he wanted to say. Before the words bubbled up she had rounded on him. “What are you doing here? It’s almost three in the morning!” His lips pursed and he pointed an accusing finger at her. "You don't, an' that's the problem, cause it's mine!" He snarled as his head spun, trying poorly to explain that she was wrong for trying to take his place at the hotel he was named for. He was the heir, the legacy! How could she try and rob him of that? What right did she have! Julie grabbed his arm and tugged him further into the apartment. Remy tried to fight it but his legs moved of their own volition. “Please keep your voice down, you’ll wake the neighbors.” He suddenly snatched his hand away from her, hating how she talked down to him all the time, like he was some sort of incompetent fool. Granted, at the moment he was, but normally he was plenty capable of performing his job and well.

Remy desperately tried to piece the words in his mind together, but they were swirling around like a freak sandstorm. Too much liquor mixed with the oxycontin he'd taken for the dull ache in his arm. Really, he should be sleeping it off considering how dizzy and drowsy he was, but like a fool he was fighting it which made him ten times worse. Julie's hands slid onto her hips and his vision doubled for a moment, confusing him further. “What do you want, Remy?” His brows furrowed again and he pointed at her accusingly once more. "You!" He snapped. "Goin' here all mighty!" He swayed a little, his feet giving out as he tipped to the side. By some miracle he was close enough to the couch that when he toppled he fell onto the soft cushions. The comfortable seat suddenly made him feel more relaxed, the weariness kicking in. "My job, Jules! Don't!" Remy's voice was a raspy growl and he glared at her until his eyes actually hurt. He slipped them shut and put his hands over his face, cradling it as he growled angrily into it. He couldn't think straight, couldn't get out exactly what he wanted and he knew it.

Remy's demeanor suddenly changed, his shoulders slumping forward almost defeatedly. What chance did he have to save his career when Julie had outshone him so much over the last few weeks? She'd visited his mom everyday, held down the fort, tried to take care of him though he didn't want her to.. She was picture perfect while he fucked up again and again because it was all he knew. "Don't tell her." He all but whimpered, groaning after as he rubbed his eyes. "My job.. don't. Don't.." He opened his eyes and focused on her pathetically, frowning in her direction at the sight of her. "Please, I'm sorry.." He felt his body getting heavy and the anger flared again very suddenly at his inability to control himself and then at Julie for being so controlled. "Not better, Jules! You're not! Got it?" He snapped again throwing that accusing finger at her.

[JULIE BRADY]

Julie backed up slightly, her eyes wide with surprise as Remy pointed a drunk finger in her face. “You! Goin’ here all mighty!” Her gaze shifted sideways briefly in her confusion, not sure how to respond. Those blue eyes snapped back as she saw Remy slowly tipping to the side. She instinctively stepped forward to catch him, but the man slumped to the couch cushions instead and she let him do so, knowing it was probably safer for everybody if he was sitting. Still, she continued to watch him with worry. He was really fucked up… “My job, Jules! Don’t!” The way he glared at her showed he was very passionate about what he was saying, but it was being lost in translation. Did he think she was threatening his job? How would that even be possible? He was the heir to the hotel! There was no way she was going to get that over him. She wouldn’t even want it anyway. All she wanted was to own a small B&B of her own. She didn’t want to take on the Remington. Before she could say this, though, Remy buried his face in his hands, growling softly before his shoulders slumped completely. Her loss for words was profound as she watched the man before her with bewilderment. What did he want her to do?

“Don’t tell her.” His voice was suddenly so pitiful and Julie cocked her head to the side, stepping closer to him. “My job…don’t. Don’t…” She shook her head gently as Remy’s sad, deep blue eyes met her own. “Please, I’m sorry…” Swallowing hard, Julie wasn’t sure what he was referring to specifically or if he was just apologizing for his behavior the last few weeks in general. When he looked so helpless, it was hard not to want to forgive him. But just like that, his eyes changed again and that finger pointed at her once more. “Not better, Jules! You’re not! Got it?” Her brows lowered over her piercing blue eyes, shaking her head again. “I never said I was, Remy.” He made a sound like he was refuting her claim and she stepped forward again, now standing just in front of him. “Hey! I never said or thought I was better than you. I do think you could have handled all of this better, but I shouldn’t have thrown everything in your face like I’ve been handling it perfectly. And if you think I’m gunning for your job, you’re mistaken. I think you’re good at what you do when you’re around to do it. And I’m not going to tell your mom anything about the last couple weeks except what relates to business. We have security now and the recovery of the business is running smoothly—that’s all she needs to know. Okay?” She may have been a goody-two-shoes, but she wasn’t a snitch. Caroline didn’t need to know her son had been bed hopping and binge drinking since she ended up in the hospital. She wasn’t even planning on bringing up that he’d barely worked a day since the incident or that she’d barely taken time to herself. It would only upset her and that was the last thing the woman needed after coming out of a coma.

Sighing heavily, Julie ran a hand through her hair. “As for everything else…with us…I’d rather pretend it didn’t happen. It’s better if we’re not together anyway. You obviously need more than I’m able to give you. Or maybe it’s the other way around…I don’t know. Either way, I don’t know what to do to make you happy, Remy.” She hated the feeling of defeat saying those words gave her. Everything in her body felt heavy just thinking about her future with Remy; or rather, her lack of one. Was there anything they could do to mend the hurt between them? Her eyes were sad and defeated as she looked into his. “I’m sorry I was so harsh with you about what was going on with your mom. I should have been more understanding. I don’t really have a good excuse for how I spoke to you. Maybe it’s just my exhaustion. But I know I could have handled that a lot better. Maybe I can’t make up for it, but you can sleep on the couch tonight if you need to. You’re really messed up and you shouldn’t go anywhere.” Even if they couldn’t be together anymore, she didn’t want anything bad to happen to Remy. He meant a lot to her and sending him out into the night the way he was now just seemed wrong on so many levels.

[REMY GRAHAM]

Remy was beginning to feel dizzy even though he was sitting perfectly still on the couch. He shut his eyes tight and rubber them, which felt so good that he continued to rub them as Julie began to speak. He missed the first part of whatever she said, his pinkened eyes opening to look up at her from his place down on the couch. She was moving closer and he had to look up more, her blurry figure focusing as she stood in front of him. “Hey! I never said... think you could have handled all of this better.. thrown everything in your face... I’m gunning for your job... you’re good at ..do it. And I’m not going .. mom anything about..what relates to business." She kept talking, Remy only grabbing a few snippets of words here and there, none of it making sense in his mind. He simply watched her, trying to grasp the words spewing from her mouth like a flu ridden toddler. "Okay?” In the end he had absolutely no idea what she was telling him, whether it was she was going to tell his mom everything or not. She looked like she was being on the nice side, which confused him more. She wanted his job! Was she placating him?

“As for…with us…...it didn’t happen." He squinted up, trying like hell to make heads or tails of what she was saying. Was she ending things with them? He couldn't tell. "You obviously need more than..." He felt the anger bubbling in his stomach again. After everything, she was going to start talking about their bullshit relationship? Did they even have a relationship? Maybe he didn't want to be with her! Maybe he was done playing around with Julie! She was convenient, that's the only reason he stuck around. Or that's what his alcohol and pain pill riddled mind told him. While the dangerous thoughts bounced around his head he missed every word that came out of her mouth. "..You’re really messed up and you... That was all he could stand.

A surge of energy shot through him with his new found anger towards Julie. "Fuck you!" He snapped, the adrenaline pumping through him, more potent than any of the liquor or pills he'd taken. He turned and swung his arm, back handing a lamp clear off a table. It shattered on the ground, luckily in large pieces which would make for an easier cleanup. Remy stumbled a little as he moved closer to Julie. "I'm not a charity! You.. I don't need you.. pity!" He all but spat the last word turning and kicking her coffee table, only he missed and instead swung himself off balance. Remy's body twisted as he tripped over his own feet and came crashing to the ground, bringing the coffee table over with him. Luckily the furniture stayed in tact, but everything on it fell on the floor. Remy had no idea what was there, hearing the clattering of objects hitting the ground, possibly breaking, not that he could even wrap his mind around what he was actually doing. His bad arm stung and he growled loudly in pain, rolling a bit to his good side and cradling the bad arm. He could hear Julie frantically saying something but the words just wouldn't form. He laid there with his eyes shut, rolling on his good side back and forth until he found was able to get his body to a point where he could get to his feet. "Stop fucking talking!" He snapped at her, finally, sloppily getting to his feet and stumbling a little to the left and almost bumping into her and the couch. He looked around, unable to understand anything she was saying to him. "Jesus!" Where the hell was the door!